the guy

Back in the day when I was a drunk @ss hole I would taken the kid over to the OM house, and gave OM a taste of reality.

Do not let her back in, she will come home tomorow and think you are the same old chump. Get up early and change the locks.

To night pack her crap up and take it to eric's. throw the kids in the truck and bring all her crap over there and just put it on his front lawn.

Posse

You might want to waver soon. Don't. You made your call, and it was the right call.

Hold your head high. She made her bed. Now she needs to lie in it.

That text alone told you everything you would ever want to know, even if you didn't know the back story.

No booze--Exercise instead

Execute the 180. Go dark. Expose far and wide.

Meet with a good lawyer ASAP.

Kallan Pavithran

Let she have the consequences of her disrespect and serial cheating on your . Change the locks, throw her stuffs at his gate. Call her and tell her you dumped her things at his home. Let him take care of her, sure he will throw her under the bus on that movement itself.

Expose her to all the friends and family.

the guy

I think the nail in the coffin is if infact she went over to eric's.
With her fragile marriage she will go to her lovers house, that in its self says alot about how remorseful she realy is.

If she had any sence of what she is doing as being wrong she should go to her parents or her girl friends house. Boy is that wishfull thinking.

Posse

Add an STD test to the list of things to do

Shamwow

Ugh. Triggering me a bit when you describe her drunken behavior. Let her GO. You'll feel sorry for her, even guilty for "putting her in a tough spot", but it's all bs. She has to figure this out and sober up. She has no idea what she's doing, and the problem is she doesn't care. She needs a dose of reality. Your one remaining obligation to her is to give her that dose. No more. You can't fix her at this point, because she's cut you out of her life by openly cheating and disrespecting you. No more.
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Shaggy

Pack her junk into garbage bags and drive it overland drop it on Eric's lawn.

Seriously ditch this wh0re
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Humble Pie

You must be exhusted, how do you continue with such a person?? 11 years of marriage, kids, is that the two main reasons?

Your kids definately do not need to be going through such a roller coaster every other day, it just is not the right thing to do, as a parent you need to focus on your children (But in your journal, you never mention you children- its like they dont exists!!)

You say are yourself are an alcoholic, from what you learned about the disease, dont you understand you are the world's biggest ENABLER? How can you sit there and feed into her disease? Isnt the tough love what she needs, dont you need a little self respect?

You guys eat a lot of ribs!!!

Humble Pie

I think the faster you make a stand and stop giving in to her unacceptable behavior, she will hit the bottom and hopefully reality will set in. Not for your marriage to again work, but her her own sake. You must not let her come back!

Shaggy

She spends the night using you to get her warmed up for Eric, then ditches you to get banged by him.

Come on, your self esteem will sky rocket when you dump her junk outside and change the locks tomorrow. Btw cut off her access to money ASAP. Let Eroc pay for her.
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Kallan Pavithran

This is not something you are doing to her, it was her choice and she earned it by her cheating and treating her husband like a POS.

chaos

As far as your fear of being alone, let me clue you in on something buddy YOU ALREADY ARE ALONE.

__________________
“You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche

morituri

You tried the softline approach and it failed miserably. Now it is time to try the hardline approach and let her face the consequences of her actions alone. No more husband to pay for her lifestyle, let the OM do it. You have the kids well being to concentrate on, they need at least one responsible adult in their lives to look after them.

__________________
"Man is not a rational animal, he is a rationalizing animal." Robert A. Heinlein

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the guy

You've had a tough nite, I hope you come back for some support.
Even combat vets can't compare to the pain of this kind of betrayal.

Vanton68

With all of the deep thinking, self-reflection and evaluation that I have always done. That NEVER crossed my mind. It is so simple and uncomplicated that I overlooked it. Thank you, I feel so strange after reading this, like there are unexplored options to consider.