lovelygirl

This is code for "I knew he would show up there that day so that's why I went there too".
And the fact that her friend left earlier it's code for "I agreed with my friend to leave so that I could be alone with him"

Believe me, girls do that. I've done it with my girlfriends when I wanted to be left in the company of my crush.


Stupid reason.

She didn't like his sexual pressure yet she went in his truck for the second time.

__________________
Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.

BigLiam

What a complete crock of shiiite. Are you in the market for a bridge or some waterfront property in AZ?

iheartlife

I would tell her, no bars period without me. She was at the bar with a GF and at least the second time your WS got in trouble after the GF left. So whether GF was toxic or no, she ended up alone w. him. I just don't see how the 'new' way is any different.

Restaurants, fine, and before a certain hour. But no bars without you. If she's going to blame the alcohol, this is a modest boundary to set and one that many married couples use anyhow.
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Lon

If his W has already trickle-truthed almost everything out anyway, I don't think a polygraph is going to shed any new light on things for Martinique, it comes down to how willing he is to be deceived and how long he wants to stick his head in the sand - if he is willnig to let her blameshift she will have no problem uttering the facts because he is convinced that she is a good person who couldn't make those choices to hurt their marriage willingly. By him blaming the AD's and alcohol he is absolving her of her personal responsibility and she will have to make no changes in order to get the best of both worlds - A loving supportive H who provides and listens to her problems and the knowledge that she can go mess around and just blame the circumstance and keep the status quo.

bandit.45

Make sure you name me listing agent on that.

Shaggy

Have here plain the phone, and the have her take the polygraph.

I know you want to believe her.
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jh52

Martin - These are your words you wrote from your first POST:

"One day I slipped a voice recorder in the car she took to school last week and I recorded a conversation between him and her. She was trying to convince him to come over and meet me so I could become friends with him and allow her to continue to hang out with him without me giving her **** for it. She offered to make love to him, let him eat her out and even give him a blow job if he would just agree to come over and meet me."

Was she drunk here as well ??

iheartlife

Yes, that is the part that I return to over and over. It's the most implausible part of the story.

I could sort of buy into the idea that she wanted him to leave her alone after letting things go too far. And I could sort of buy into wanting the guy to meet my husband so he would lay off. But I can't see how promising sexual favors would accomplish that task. Promise him all kinds of sexual favors, lure him home to meet your husband, have them become friends and then the favors will be given? Does that seem like a way to get someone you want to get away from to back off?

Shaggy

So on the first day with the var you just happened to nail the single worst call.? Dude, by that lottery ticket!

Have you pulled her cell phone records to see how often she was calling him?
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chapparal

It does sound like she's trying. I'll give her props for that. I think her drinking is your biggest problem.

Good luck and prayers.

Jibril

I dunno about that...

Sounds to me like she doesn't want to be divorced, and she's trying to keep the peace. She's telling him what she has because he cornered her and caught her entirely within her lie, so she's fessing up and telling what she cannot hide.

Martinique78's story on the previous page smells an awful lot like BS. She injects awkward flattery to make him feel better about the affair. Statements like -

"He pulled it out, she said she laughed cause it was so small and said what do you expect me to do with that."

and

"So she gave him oral sex in and out three times then she said I can do this either. She got dressed and came home."

- Sound more like damage control, with her trying to convince her betrayed spouse that the incident wasn't as serious as it actually was.

Judging by what has been revealed over the course of this topic, it seems to me like the wife wanted to maintain the affair - she liked the other man. She admits she likes him and wants to continue seeing him in the recorded conversation. Her reason for continuing to see him are highly suspect too (I think they're an outright crock of ****, honestly).

It's clear the wife doesn't want to lose her marriage with Martinique78. At the same time, she's still trickling truths to him in hopes that she satisfies his inquiries, without having to be completely honest.

Sadly, I don't have any good advice to give Martinique78. Just, don't get too complacent, and don't assume because she's being more outgoing with certain details, that you guys are in full R mode. I definitely wish you luck, since I truly believe you can work through this affair. But be vigilant, and see that she adheres to your rules.

warlock07

I think she is fooling herself and rewriting the history whether it is intentional or not.(Best case scenario is that lying about her affair is her coping mechanism and facing what she was duing it, I won't have to describe the worst case scenario)

iheartlife

Yes, this was the other part of her confession that struck me. While perhaps Martinique left that out, there is a notable absence of her liking the OM. Again, it's the plausibility. I buy into beer goggles--once. Twice? Plus the VAR conversation? The lady doth protest too much.

I want to believe that she will come clean before it's too late. I just don't think she's there yet.

snap

Between what she told you and what she said when she didn't think you were listening, I'd believe the latter.

Almostrecovered

Sniff sniff

Do you smell that?

That's trickle truth!

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