I have been married for almost 12 years to my high school sweetheart, we married at the age of 20. We have a beautiful daughter. 2 years ago we were forced to file Chapter 13. My wife lost some trust in me because I may not have been as upfront about or financial situation as I should have.
About 6 months ago, she had a new manager start working with her. She would tell me about all of the jokes and cutting up that they would do. I would jokingly accuse her of liking him. Well about 2 months ago, she quit talking about this manager, and started picking fights with me and my daughter. She would get mad when I would ask what her plans for the next day was. She was never letting me know what she was doing on her days off, I would ask her what she did on her day off and she would say I stayed home all day, but banking records showed differently. On Valentines day, my wife, daughter and I went out shopping trying to spend some quality time together. I thought pretty good day. The next day she had to work, and told me she would call when leaving work so that I could have my daughter ready to go out to dinner. I called my wife's work at about 1 pm and was told that she left work at around 12 pm. I called her cell phone she did not answer, She returned my call at 2:45 pm, saying that she was on her way home, she decided to get her nails done and get coffee on the spur of the moment. This upset me that she could not have called and told me that when she decided to do that, because I could have been doing something else. When she got home she told me that she wanted to seperate, because she could not stand me trying to control her. Something did not add up right, so I checked her cell phone usage for the period and saw that she had 3100 text messages total, 3000 were to one person in particular. I checked her phone, she deleted all messages and the contact information. I asked who this person was and she just stated a friend, and that I would not understand. The friend ended up being her manager who is also married with 4 children. The next night she left to stay with her parents. Leaving me with our daughter. She came back home 2 days later, and tells me that she is planning a trip to her girlfriends house at the beach in 2 weeks. then the following sunday, I was putting away clothes and ran across a cell phone that I have never seen before. I asked her about it and she told me that her manager is paying for the phone so that I could not track her phone activity. She then proceeded to tell me that she has feelings for this person and asked for permission to pursue the relationship with him and stay at home with me. I told her no. That Friday came, and I snuck into her luggage and found lingery and sexy relation quizzes for new couples, she denied she was going with him, that she did not realize that the lingery was in the bag. I later found out that she was going to a different beach than I was told, and found out through facebook that he was going to the same beach that same weekend. I called her told her get out of my house.
Now I am willing to reconcile our marriage because I am a firm beleiver in the bible, and know that the Lord frowns on divorce. She is not willing to give up her friend to save our marriage and now blames me for the separation because I kicked her out.
Andy advice would be helpful.