highwood

I ask because I keep hearing that journalling is good for you. The MC suggested it to me on Friday....so I tried it this morning. He told me to write a letter to H, that he would never see.

I did do it this morning..it feels strange to me as it is something I am not familiar with however I do feel slightly better after journalling. I was feeling very negative however now I feel a little bit more positive.

THoughts/perspecitives on journaling and if it helped you much appreciated. How often do you journal, etc.

chapparal

Just courious, why wouldn't you also send the letter to your husband? I'm not syaing you should but it seems like it would be a good idea to send some of the stuff you write to the wayward.

canttrustu

I do. It helps me get out the ugly stuff Im thinking. When we have our 'talks' I try to not say too much b/c I dont want to react out of pain and anger. So I try to just let the things he says process and part of that sometimes is to write out what he said and what I was thinking when he said it. Curse words and all! Infidelity is such a painful subject and so personal that I cant even talk to my friends or family much b/c it doesnt feel like they understand. They all have quick fixes. In reality, there are no quick fixes. You've heard 'em; "forgive and forget" or "if it were me, I'd put his ass on the curb"...they mean to be helpful but they havent been where we are so really its nonproductive. So when I journal I write everything/anything and alot of times it feels alot better just to get it off my chest(much like writing on TAM).

So how did MC go?

Onmyway

Probably the same reason that I would never want my W to read my thread on this forum, I have told her pretty much everything that I have said in there at one point or another, however it can be therapeutic to be able to write, complain, call them names etc. without them ever having to see it. Think of it as an additional outlet.

Shooboomafoo

I used my little audio recorder to vent into. Got about a year and a half of little in-car chats to myself. Its from when I first found out about the ongoing text msgs, until after I moved out after divorcing.
Every once in awhile I talk into it.

arbitrator

My IC is a large proponent of letter-writing. Initially, I wrote a lot, but as of late, I haven't really felt the need as much. I have personally felt much better about the impending divorce, and not nearly as angry as I am bewildered; but I can certainly go back to writing in my journal as needed!

__________________
"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html

highwood

M/C was good..he gave me/us good tools to work on communication, etc. I told him that at times I berate myself for dwelling on what happened, tell myself that others have it worse, etc. etc. and he said that is self criticicism..he said what you have to tell yourself instead is "I am having a hard time today dealing with this".

I know what you are saying...it is hard to explain to people the conflicting emotions within you...I find that one minute I think kick him out because I feel so negative and defeated and then the next minute I feel hopeful and positive.

mahike

I think keeping a journal has had it ups and downs for me. I can see how far was have come but I reread what my feelings were that day and about my triggers and then I start the mind movies agian.

I then get short of breath and then get angry all over again. Which I did this weekend.

At this point I have thought about burning my journal and trying to move on with out it

canttrustu

Oh I dont KEEP it! I save it for a week or so then once I have worked thru THAT PARTICULAR MOMENT of anger, I shred it. Doesnt mean I wont write again another day, But if I kept it, I know it would just p*ss me off all over every time.