Does a woman who starts an inappropriate relationship on WoW actually arrange a date and expect to meet a 2 foot dwarf with long beard, horned helmet and a huge hammer?
I hope not, because I'm actually an undead hunter carrying a flaming bow with a flaming pet turtle.
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I haven't really thought about the future that much, but when I die I think I'll go back to doing whatever I was doing for the fifteen billion years before I was born.
Does a woman who starts an inappropriate relationship on WoW actually arrange a date and expect to meet a 2 foot dwarf with long beard, horned helmet and a huge hammer?
I wonder that too.... or if some guy expects to meet a hot tall elf woman.....
The use of things like Facebook has hampered many people from actually being able to form and maintain relationships.
Face to face = stimulating relationships
Facebook = simulating relationships.
It's so easy to be someone else, act differently, temporaraly alter perceptions and behaviours online. People don't get to see the you who gets out of bed. The you who feels down. The you who is tired and wants some alone time. The you who has just had a huge disagreement with the boss and wants to strangle someone. The you who gets bored.
That's why internet - inparticularly facebook - relationships can ONLY be built on fantasy. It becomes two people lying to each other about who they really are and then lying to their partners to protect that self-created, false version of reality.
It's not real.
Until time passes, the physical meetings become more and more, then, usually after they've been discovered, their marriage ended and they are set to be together, the real traits come through.
It's not suprising that so many affair relationships fall apart.
There was only a simulated relationship between them, not a stimulating one.
Badger- I would agree and disagree. In my wife's case she did hook up with strangers and had internet sex and then actual sex with a stranger and it was all built on fantasy. Not sure if my mentioning that the guys she was doing this with were not only doing it with her but other women as well means anything to her or not.
On the other hand she pursued people from her HS. She claims that she meant nothing by it but I have the emails back and forth between her and some of her "old friends" from 2010 and if I posted them here all would agree that she was not innocently trying to connect with "old friends" but was pursuing much more than that. In this area she was not so much in fantasy (played a part) but reconnecting with old feelings, desires, and her days of partying. I will submit that perhaps this is fantasy, but I do know that meeting strangers online and then having sex with them is quite different then rekindling old desires. The end result is the same and I might be wrong and splitting hairs, but this is just my opinion.
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This kind of cosmic dumbassery occupies a temporal plane of ineptitude and lack of reason so profound a Zen master could spend a lifetime meditating upon its philosophical consequences.”
Seriously! My FB page is full of friends' babies, lame polls and LOLCats!
Not a smudge of innuendo on the whole thing!
LOL. Cats? Come on. It is a front. If I IM'd you and say your babies are cute it could start a conversation that goes secret. Ok I am JK. But that is how it all started with my wife and you can call me paranoid. A stranger friend requested my wife. She asked me to check him out. He had small kids, a wife, involved with a church, his dad was a pastor. He and my wife played the same game. In three days, she was in love with him, having internet sex with him, sending him love songs when his father died within days of meeting him.
FB is not the issue in and of itself. It is the people using it and their stupid psychological issues, low boundaries, etc. I am a gun owner, and will always say that it is not the gun but the person who kills. But FB and all social media is a quick anonymous means to exploit those desires that lurk in a dark soul.
Without the internet I doubt that my wife would have felt empowered or bold enough to do what she did. She felt in control. She felt power. She could go into fantasy land and felt safe. When it went PA she controlled the situation by driving our car to meet him (at her choosing) and drive him to the hotel or where ever they had sex. The OM never had the chance to pursue her.
It is not that my WS did not have this in her but the internet allowed her to do it. Without the internet she would not have done it. Without a cell phone she would not have text these guys over and over again and developed such strong feelings, because she would not have been able to cultivate those feelings.
It is just easier today. I would say that the twisted souls of WS's are driven to these things and fall prey to their own desires and the advances of others like them.
If I wanted to I could get laid tonight by an old GF. She is on my FB page. She has always made it known to me that she still has an interest. I was the only BF she had that did not have sex with her. I always liked her. She was fun but she was a full blown skank. I did not have sex with her because she is a skank. Funny, always had good times with her, but call me whatever, but I am not an easy lay and never will be. Not that I did not want to, just felt it would not be worth catching something or worth the drama. I remember one time we were together and she stripped for me. She said she wanted sex and I said no. We were dating and she then proceeded to have sex with my best friend the following day and got pregnant. I remember telling her that she is just stupid and hope that she has a great life. My best friend could not believe what he did and has regretted it for the rest of his life (child support, etc). She never did any more with him and has had one divorce after the other. She is a skank. And is all over FB looking for her next lay. I feel sorry for her.
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This kind of cosmic dumbassery occupies a temporal plane of ineptitude and lack of reason so profound a Zen master could spend a lifetime meditating upon its philosophical consequences.”
I still don't see the big deal with FB, but then again, I have it to chat with my mommy friends, post pics of my kids, and see other people's kids. O.o
Hubs doesn't have a FB. Never has...not into online social sites. So maybe that is why i don't worry. lol! No reason to worry!
I've had people from the past send a message, but I don't add them.
I feel sorry for you Thorburn, having to carry the burden of this woman. But you know how I feel.
I know bandit. My IC told me last night that if she does not get serious treatment she will do it again just like my IC in 2010 told me. Right before IC I found out that our house deal will more than likely fall through and I was in a rare mood going into IC. I told my counselor about it and said I do not want to spend much time on our house. My IC then told me that my WS needs IC (which she is getting) and group for accountability and support. I agree. My IC focused on my WS and her issues and I said I don't want to spend my time working on my WS. My IC told me that my WS's issues are much more damaging and threatening then me looking at porn. So I will see where we go from here. For me, if my WS gets the treatment she needs and can stay straight I will be fine with that. I will never ever buy that she did it because I looked at porn and my IC agreed with me. My IC told me that my wife's issues are not because I looked at porn. I told my IC that I do not want her to agree with me. That I will be completely honest no matter how much it pains me. So I feel I am getting help and hope that my wife listens to me. I told her what my IC told me and she listened. I hope she takes it to heart.
I can get all wrapped up and pissed off about what my wife did over the years, but in the end if she can be faithful to me for the rest of her life I can be at peace with that. My fear is that she will not be and that I then have wasted my time.
In 2010 the OM said to my wife on FB at around 11 P.M. on April 23rd as I was in bed with Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever, "You are pretty" and that is all it took for her to go nuts on internet sex with a guy she just met a few days prior. At times up till 5:30 A.M. and back again at 7:05 A.M. for weeks at a time with me next to her. All because of FB and her low boundaries.
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This kind of cosmic dumbassery occupies a temporal plane of ineptitude and lack of reason so profound a Zen master could spend a lifetime meditating upon its philosophical consequences.”
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Re: FB, it's so easy 
lol
