I do not feel different, just very curious about other experiences. Do post-marriage people change? Do cheaters suddenly change after marriage? etc ...
No they don`t, not because of marriage.
Anything that is slightly irritating to you pre marriage is gonna drive you nuts post marriage.
If she`s a serial cheater as you say it`s quite unlikely she`ll change without some type of deep personal epiphany.
That's exactly why I am asking people around me, and anyone feel it odd, or ask me to let it go.
I do not feel different, just very curious about other experiences. Do post-marriage people change? Do cheaters suddenly change after marriage? etc ...
The option of breaking up is the one that I consider the most as I think people do not change that easy.
Yes, people can change. But, in your case there are so many things which make me grind my teeth.
she cheated on others in the past
she wasn't clear about not being exclusive (ok, this would affect me and it seems to affect you)
she needs to get married in order to stay here
she invites her former fxxx buddy to the wedding.
The last one is the one which makes me the most worried about this. Just out of respect for you, she shouldn't invite or have any contact with him.
Super clear, happy to see that I'm not the only ones considering all of this crossing the red line.
By the way I learned all of this recently during the wedding preparation, and I can tell, they were absolutely no signs to make me think she was like this.
By the way I learned all of this recently during the wedding preparation, and I can tell, they were absolutely no signs to make me think she was like this.
She is an experienced cheater, that's why. So how many guys are there in total?
Sorry friend, you know exactly why she wants to marry you. You also know how bad it will get once you're married. Count yourself EXTREMELY lucky to find this info before the marriage and just RUN!!
Super clear, happy to see that I'm not the only ones considering all of this crossing the red line.
By the way I learned all of this recently during the wedding preparation, and I can tell, they were absolutely no signs to make me think she was like this.
You previously posted that there were no red flags in the past 2 months,so just how long has your relationship been in total? With this kind of uncertainty you're definitely better being safe rather than sorry and were right to at least postpone the wedding.
Well, despite all this reasons and facts, we love each others. It is in both sides and very obvious.
Also there were absolutely no red flag during the past 2 months.
We live together, and know each other families.
To recenter to the topic, my concern is the past in general, the past cheating with me, and the critical decision to make her stay or not.
Are you saying you've only been dating 2 months?
You are insane if you are thinking of marrying anyone after only 2 months.
You previously posted that there were no red flags in the past 2 months,so just how long has your relationship been in total? With this kind of uncertainty you're definitely better being safe rather than sorry and were right to at least postpone the wedding.
Super short, only 5 months. As I said we are immigrants, and we have a deadline in our visa. But the simple fact to get married in a serious way (with family involved) change everything in my behaviors in the way that I became super careful, asking her much more questions that any regular relationship. We can't make it longer to know each others well. As far as i know, and learned with the time, there are real emotions involved (living together help) , and also a serious past to consider.
Super short, only 5 months. As I said we are immigrants, and we have a deadline in our visa. But the simple fact to get married in a serious way (with family involved) change everything in my behaviors in the way that I became super careful, asking her much more questions that any regular relationship. We can't make it longer to know each others well. As far as i know, and learned with the time, there are real emotions involved (living together help) , and also a serious past to consider.
Are you a legal alien? (I don't mean from outer space. I mean from outside the U.S.)
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Re: Before getting married 
The ones from out of space couldn't give a rat's ass about papers
