caught my wife sexting on facebook
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Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity.

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Old 05-12-2012, 01:11 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default caught my wife sexting on facebook

ok i caught my wife a couple of months ago sending sexual messages to her old guy friend.The messages were reallly sexual basiclly he saying he wanted to have sex with her and she was in all these ways and she agreed. we talked and she said she told me everything but now she lies about her past, i just found out 90%of her male friends she has had sex with and she still messages the. im so lost what should i do?

ps we have a son and just got married before i found this out!!!
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

So she now knows that you found about about her sexting?

Are you willing to stay with her if she gives up her male friends and goes transparent?
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:22 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

She`s got to give up the FaceBook.

No Contact on FaceBook.

Gives you all passwords, complete transparency.
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:27 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

yeah she know i know about the sexting but she told me it wasnt just facebook she did the same on yahoo aim. she said she did it to feel sexy.but she keeps changing her story
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:28 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

Can you monitor her emails and texts/call logs?
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:31 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

i want to stay but the more she lies the more i wanna leave
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:32 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

Quote:
Originally Posted by tacoma View Post
She`s got to give up the FaceBook.

No Contact on FaceBook.

Gives you all passwords, complete transparency.
I'm gonna go a step further... watch the apps she has on her cell. If she has a droid or iphone, I KNOW there are chat apps that use the data, so it won't show up on texts... I know from experience. And if she has Facebook installed on her cell, have it removed. And check periodically to see if she reactivates it, if deleted. If she doesn't delete, then remove AND block these guys on her list. Make HER block them. Blocking them, she won't be able to see them on her page at all. If you log onto her page and put the name in, and if they come up, then you know she has gone against the agreement. If you "unblock" someone on there, you have to wait 48 hours before you can block again. Been there, done that.
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:32 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

she deleted most of the conversations in her email i tried everything
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:34 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

Install a keylogger on the computer she uses.

Which brand phone is she using?
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:34 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

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yeah she know i know about the sexting but she told me it wasnt just facebook she did the same on yahoo aim. she said she did it to feel sexy.but she keeps changing her story
Without her noticing, if possible, go in and change the settings to save the history... on BOTH the computer AND the cell. Can't remember if it shows automatically when you start conversations on the cell tho.
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:38 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

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Originally Posted by supermad30 View Post
she lies about her past, i just found out 90%of her male friends she has had sex with and she still messages the.
There is much debate (and books written) about about if married people should have friends of the opposite sex. Many people say no, but even those that say yes have rules against keeping as friends any past lovers. Since your wife has proven to be untrustworthy on this issue, her marital boundaries should now exclude all friends of the opposite sex, regardless or not if they were past lovers. If you did not have a child with her, I would be recommending even more drastic actions.
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Old 05-12-2012, 01:40 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

You need to know exactly what is going on in your marriage so that you can make an informed decision on what you want to do.

Install a keylogger. Get one of the ones that either emails the logs to your email or that stores the logs on a web site so you can access it without being on the computer she is using.

Since she is lying, do not tell her right now what you are doing. Gather data for a while. You will get to know all of the accounts she uses online and her passwords. Go in and copy off all the emails, messages, etc. Get the evidince you need. The only way to get her to face what she is doing is to expose it to the light of day. with this evidence she will not be able to deny what she's been up to.

If this is what she needs to feel sexy she needs serious couseling and your marriage is in serious trouble.
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Old 05-12-2012, 02:12 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

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i want to stay but the more she lies the more i wanna leave
You would be well advised to leave, IMO. Her level of promiscuity does not bode well for marriage material.
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Old 05-12-2012, 02:22 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

DNA test for the kid, followed by divorce papers for the wife. Nondisclosure of previous sex partners is essentially marriage fraud. I'm assuming you had the talk before entering into the marriage contract, right?
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Old 05-12-2012, 02:33 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: caught my wife sexting on facebook

I may be labeled a prude, but there is a relationship between promiscuity in single life and infidelity. If your wife was having sex with a lot of male friends, she views it as a recreational activity, not something sacred.
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