Why is the WS surprised to learn that their AP lied to them?
My WW believed everything OM had to say,if he said it was true,she took him at his word.
The lies, all big and small she gobbled up.He's got a ton of money?No, he's got creditors looking for him including the IRS.Has a CDL license,no again,doesnt even have a regular license,makes 80K a year,another lie,he's a supervisor ,nope.
It just bugs the hell out of me how a WS can take everything as a fact that the AP had to say.
After a lot of digging and having my WW sit down and read the proof did she finally see what OM was.Even the little stupid things like never wanting a cell phone,OM could barely affort it and credit was so bad no company would offer him a contract.
So,how can a WW believe everything a AP has to say? Even when its as plain as the nose on your face that things just dont add up.
Anybody else surprised at how gullable or blind their WS was? Posted via Mobile Device
Humans have an unlimited capacity to see what we want to see. Advertising works because we will believe anything. Once we are primed with a certain mindset, we will twist facts to fit our vision of reality.
Nope. Because the OM/OW is their world during the affair. I saw in their messages that OM told her she needs to drink more water because she must be dehydrated all the time and she replied that she will do what he says because she knows he loves her and cares about her......yet I've been telling her the same thing for years and she never listened to me.
Having been on the other side AR is pretty much right. Additionally you don't want to believe that you would do that to someone you love for someone who's less than a nice person. There's also the aspect of since you and the AP were involved in the affair together, if the AP is a lousy person and a cheat - what are you?? Just another of those moments you have to face yourself in the mirror, look at yourself and ask WTF????
There is always an ogre or a witch (aka the BS) trying to prevent you from living in Fantasyland
Yes I can see that,the BS ends up being evil and the AP is the hero. WW gets it now but it took a lot of proff and convincing,the ex AP even started talking trash about my WW,bad things that could have possibly gotten her hurt after I blew up the affair,sometimes WW still seems to be shocked at what she believed and the things OM said about her after the affair Posted via Mobile Device
Why is the WS surprised to learn that their AP lied to them?
My WW believed everything OM had to say,if he said it was true,she took him at his word.
The lies, all big and small she gobbled up.He's got a ton of money?No, he's got creditors looking for him including the IRS.Has a CDL license,no again,doesnt even have a regular license,makes 80K a year,another lie,he's a supervisor ,nope.
It just bugs the hell out of me how a WS can take everything as a fact that the AP had to say.
After a lot of digging and having my WW sit down and read the proof did she finally see what OM was.Even the little stupid things like never wanting a cell phone,OM could barely affort it and credit was so bad no company would offer him a contract.
So,how can a WW believe everything a AP has to say? Even when its as plain as the nose on your face that things just dont add up.
Anybody else surprised at how gullable or blind their WS was? Posted via Mobile Device
Is this due to FOG? Sometimes romantic and dreamy, but you can't see things properly...
Having been on the other side AR is pretty much right. Additionally you don't want to believe that you would do that to someone you love for someone who's less than a nice person. There's also the aspect of since you and the AP were involved in the affair together, if the AP is a lousy person and a cheat - what are you?? Just another of those moments you have to face yourself in the mirror, look at yourself and ask WTF????
Excellent points.
My STBEH had the audacity to initially tell me what a good person the OW was and he convinced me not to "ruin her life" by outing her. I did not out her. Someone else did.
Still, I said to him this woman is a serial cheater who neglects her 4 children to go out with married men. How nice can she be.
But, the thought did cross my mind that he needs to see her as a nice person because he wants to still see himself as a nice person.
The thing is, she may be a nice person, as long as you are not her spouse. Also she painted her husband as a bully and neglectful.
The OW's own father told me that was not true. Her husband was kind and generous with her and the in-laws and they appeared to have a very affectionate loving relationship
That is like with my H's EA..she was filipino and he met her in Singapore and ironically she wanted to come to Canada where her friend lives now...being the brilliant mind that H was never saw thru that at all. Everybody else after his EA first thing they said..couldn't he see that he was probably being used.
Nope not H..no she loved him totally..never shared a kiss or anything like that but she was going to love him forever (when she got to Canada)...my ass!!! Plus she had a young son who lived with his dad back in the Phillipines but she told him that is what the women in the phillipines do they leave their children to go make money out of country...bull****!
I have a pretty good bulls!t detector which makes this hard for me to understand how she could'nt see through him,I really believe he was trying to move into my house,thats what he does,moves in with a woman,uses her and then when the current girlfriend gets wise to him,he moves on.There are no records of his divorce either,another one she fell for.Even the little lies like he had to hang up his cell because the cops pulled him over,no law in our area against talking on phone and driving,not yet at least. Posted via Mobile Device
65Likes
WS shocked about AP true colors 
