06-27-2012, 08:57 AM
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Near Chicago, USA
| | Re: Great article about cheating
Originally Posted by thrway214
This article in Time
has nothing to do with infidelity specifically, but a lot of it rang true.
For example: the biggest driver of dishonesty is the ability to rationalize our actions so that we don’t lose the sense of ourselves as good people
And “Small dishonesties matter because they can lead to larger ones. Once you behave badly, at some point, you stop thinking of yourself as a good person at that level and you say, What the hell. This is something many people are familiar with in dieting. We’re disciplined until we lapse, and if we can’t think of ourselves as good people, then we figure we might as well enjoy it. And it happens with honesty as well. Cheaters too can start with one step.
Ofcourse, infidelity is perhaps the highest form of cheating, and its course is one of devastation and heartbreak.
Yes. I think cheaters start with small lies and justifications for those and then they start to be able to justify larger lies.
Cheaters are bad people though. So, I think they don't just see themselves as bad people they are bad people.
I always adored my STBEH, so I think I was blind to the fact that he was never really a good person. Hence his ability to cheat.
I did during my life meet cheaters and I never always could see that they weren't nice people in many many ways.
I was just blind to it in my STBEH.