I only posted a few times, then I needed to take a break from the online world to focus on real life for a bit. Here is what happened:
As a quick review of my situation, my H of just over a year admitted in September 2011 that he had a six month affair that ended in May 2011 and that the OW was pregnant. We briefly separated for the month of September, then he moved back in in October. He had a 'relapse', going to see pregnant OM to talk paternity and ending up kissing her in late October. Finally after nearly two months of agony; him sleeping in the living room, telling me he 'didn't know if he loved me', etc. he moved out for good in December 2011.
I was so afraid to take that step - to let him leave and be out on my own.
I spent Christmas with my family and went to visit a friend out of state for New Years. Then my sister moved in with me for a month in January and during that time I met some new people and made new friends. The last time I saw my soon-to-be-ex-husband was January 11, 2012. The baby was born in February and it turned out to be his. So now he has a daughter by a woman he can barely stand and he and I are six months into the 12-month requisite separation for divorce in our state.
In February, while out with my new friends, I met a wonderful new man who I've been seeing ever since. I know, it's dangerous to jump into a new relationship right out of an old one, but we are taking things slow and really getting to know each other.
My new BF respects me. He treats me incredibly well. We have a ton in common and most importantly, we have a GREAT time together.
This is just to let everyone out there know that if you choose to leave, it can get better. Fear IS a useless emotion and I'm so glad I was able to overcome it because my life is infinitely better now.
Thank you to all those who advised and supported me as I worked my way to this point!
Here's to creating your OWN happiness!