Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Coping with Infidelity » Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity.

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Old 07-03-2012, 10:04 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

I have personal proof that my wife is cheating on me, but I'm afraid it will not hold up in court. If I were to move some of my prized possessions out of my house and store them in a secure location would she be able to take them from me in the divorce without having a household inventory?

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Old 07-03-2012, 10:07 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

Depends, were you possessions acquired before marriage?

On the other hand you can offer her to keep her affair under wraps in return for her not wanting back those items.

In either case, when she's not at the house go with a friend and take your stuff than secure them off-site.
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:13 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

I would expect if she were to file a separation agreement it would come down to a judge saying she will get the value of her half or community property. So if your possessions were acquired during the marriage, she won't necessarily get to touch them, but she is entitled to her half of the the value of the marital property, so you will have to buy her share of your prized possessions again.
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:16 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

Ok, but what if she is so out of touch that she doesn't even have a clue as to some of the things that I have or their value for that matter?

I mean I know it is sneaky but she has screwed me so hard already I feel like this is the least I could get...
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:17 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

Protect your stuff for now, and talk to your lawyer to discuss your options.
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:18 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

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Originally Posted by IMPTEE View Post
I have personal proof that my wife is cheating on me, but I'm afraid it will not hold up in court. If I were to move some of my prized possessions out of my house and store them in a secure location would she be able to take them from me in the divorce without having a household inventory?

Thanks.
It's definitely worth the risk. In some separation agreements, you both would agree to keep whatever is in your possession, without an inventory. Clothing. Personal Affects. Non-Marital Property (what you had before you married) etc. If your "prized possessions fall into those categories, OR you agree that what is in your possession is yours, OR she doesn't protest your holding those items, then they are yours to keep.

If, however, she lists the items in a counterclaim for divorce, claiming the items as marital items and demands her fair share (50%), then you may have to give her half.

Either way, it's worth the risk. Take them and hide them.
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:19 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

If the processions got lost, stolen, misplaced, gambled away, etc. could they still be part of the community asset?
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:22 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

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If the processions got lost, stolen, misplaced, gambled away, etc. could they still be part of the community asset?
This is the angle I'm getting at...
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:25 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

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If the processions got lost, stolen, misplaced, gambled away, etc. could they still be part of the community asset?
Depends on when it happened, how it happened and whether it is truthful as to how they came to their "demise". A spouse, once separated, can't simply claim that they took possession and the property was then stolen. Has to be proof or the other spouse won't believe it and may demand monetary compensation for the missing items.
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:29 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

Just take your crap and hide it....she's screwing around and tough sh!t for her. Let the court figure it out...and for that matter let your STBXW figure it out!

Don't say a damb thing to her and if she asks, tell her "her lawyer needs to talk to your lawyer regarding anything more about the marriage and its assets".
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Old 07-03-2012, 10:31 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

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Just take your crap and hide it....she's screwing around and tough sh!t for her. Let the court figure it out...and for that matter let your STBXW figure it out!

Don't say a damb thing to her and if she asks, tell her "her lawyer needs to talk to your lawyer regarding anything more about the marriage and its assets".


Exactly right! Do it first. Leave the rest for later.
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Old 07-03-2012, 11:05 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Sell them to a friend....cheap. Buy them back at a later date.
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Old 07-03-2012, 11:46 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Can I move my stuff out before presenting her with divorce papers?

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Sell them to a friend....cheap. Buy them back at a later date.
Make sure it's a really really good friend... and not the one that you don't know is currently banging your STBXW.
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