wife and best friend having (at least) an EA

happyman64 · 08-05-2012, 07:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bff

Hey everyone,

It was a rough day. I had a couple small breakdowns throughout the day. Shopping for sheets, a pillow and a towel just so I can exist in the old empty house was particularly rough. I'll post a full recount of the confrontation tomorrow in hopes that someone can learn or benefit from it in the future. Everything you all said would happen happened. I don't know how I mustered the courage to stay strong through it, but I felt really prepared from what I learned here.

I have called a bunch of our common friends to let them know what happened. All were shocked. All want to hurt both my STBxW and the OM. I think I might be able to find contact info for the OM's GF. I think you are all right. She deserves to know.

I'm trying to line up dinners and meetings with friends, etc for the next few days to keep myself busy. I will rebuild myself - stronger, better, faster

I hate to say it, but W will walk away with about half a million before any spousal support, which I'll probably have to pay for 5 years. If she wants to, she'll have no trouble supporting both of them for a while. But that won't last forever at the rate she likes to spend.
Posted via Mobile Device

Wow BFF I was I was married to you and I am a guy! LOL!

I am glad that you are doing ok. I wish you had at least asked your wife to stay at the old house or dropped her off at your "best" friends with her suitcases but hey you did great.

And I try my hardest to keep the alimony and assets as low as possible to her. She could not even give you honesty these past few years.

But I also agree getting away from her as fast as you can so you take what you get and you walk away from this mess you did not create.

My prayers are for you today.

HM64

Ansley · 08-05-2012, 07:38 AM

In the new house ...I cried when I read that. She is heartless and he isnt even a human.

85k is great money but with the lifestyle she is used to...wont get her around the block. She is used to going to bff for all her monetary wants. I think the OM will be done for considering there is no way he can compete with that.

Sbrown · 08-05-2012, 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bff

I hate to say it, but W will walk away with about half a million before any spousal support, which I'll probably have to pay for 5 years. If she wants to, she'll have no trouble supporting both of them for a while. But that won't last forever at the rate she likes to spend.
Posted via Mobile Device

Sounds like it might be worth every penny, just to get rid of them...

Why are divorces so expensive????? Because they are worth it...

kenmoore14217 · 08-05-2012, 08:31 AM

" W will walk away with about half a million " hmmmmmm ????????

Almostrecovered · 08-05-2012, 08:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kenmoore14217

" W will walk away with about half a million " hmmmmmm ????????

If they make $335k combined per year then having a million in shared assets isn't unrealistic

country boy · 08-05-2012, 08:48 AM

BFF
You have just set a nuke off in the cheaterville camp. Good job. They are running scared right now and that is how it should be. I hope the OM sh!t his britches when he got your text.

One thing that caught me off guard that I was not prepared for was the number of mutual friends that we both associated with (me and OM) in our gang as we called it that fell into his camp when the sh!t hit the fan.

I eventually had to distance myself from nearly the whole group because they could not see the issue I had with them trying to walk the fence between OM and myself. These people I had been friends with for nearly 25 years.

These double betrayals are a b!tch BFF so stick near the ones you can still trust and take it day by day. When the dust settles you need to look around and you will see who is still standing with you and that will be your true friends.

bff · 08-05-2012, 09:35 AM

"Why are divorces so expensive? Because they're worth it!
I love this! You know who told me that joke many years ago? OM.

I've been INCREDIBLY fortunate and just got a huge payoff a few months ago from over 8 years of very hard work in a small company I helped to build, grow and sell. Now half of that will be gone in a snap of the fingers.

In the long run, I will actual be better off financially than if I stayed in the marriage. I know how to sacrifice for long term benefit. My STBxW does not, obviously. So, now I can actually save some money for my future with someone who will appreciate it more.

I live in a no-fault divorce state, since someone asked.
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jay80_98 · 08-05-2012, 09:39 AM

No, why not spend all that money prior to divorce? or give it to a brother or parent who can hold on to it and then issue the divorce papers?i

spudster · 08-05-2012, 09:39 AM

If losing some of your money means you will rid yourself of these two parasites, then it will be money well spent.

Your former best friend and so-called wife need to be taken to the public square and put on display for the cheats they are.

Horrible, horrible people.

Machiavelli · 08-05-2012, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by country boy

BFF
One thing that caught me off guard that I was not prepared for was the number of mutual friends that we both associated with (me and OM) in our gang as we called it that fell into his camp when the sh!t hit the fan.

That's because the husband is always the last to know. They'd been reconciled to your WW and OM for some time, most likely, and were happy to keep you in the dark. This will probably play out the same way, at least somewhat, with BFF here, once the smoke clears.

PBear · 08-05-2012, 10:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jay80_98

No, why not spend all that money prior to divorce? or give it to a brother or parent who can hold on to it and then issue the divorce papers?i

Because it will come out in the divorce proceedings, and judges frown on that kind of behavior. They're not idiots.

C

Sbrown · 08-05-2012, 10:05 AM

Use the cash to pay off marital debts if there is any.

Kallan Pavithran · 08-05-2012, 10:45 AM

What is your WW reaction now? Did she contacted you after this? What she is telling to others?

spudster · 08-05-2012, 10:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kallan Pavithran

What is your WW reaction now? Did she contacted you after this? What she is telling to others?

You can bet she is minimizing, blame shifting and running around frantically trying to keep as many people on her side as she can.

MAKINGSENSEOFIT · 08-05-2012, 11:00 AM

Haven't really seen anything posted about what the WW reaction was when confronted or any after that.