Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-23-2012, 01:51 PM Thread Starter
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Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

After emailing them, it took 6 hours for the response. Her text to me: "hard to read" and "surreal". She knows I'm serious, and my only response to her was, "I will let the lawyer know it's a go."

The court date is 10/31, and seeing the final agreement, while sobering, didn't knock me out emotionally as I thought it might. The 180 has been a life-saver for me. Detaching, no contact except for essential child and divorce issues, not responding to her occasional efforts at small talk via texts.

Her life has been spiraling, health problems, can't find a decent job, growing debt, her old car breaking down... I seem to be going in the other direction. I have my daughter most of the time, she doesn't want to be around the AP, I've been saving money and enjoying going out to coffee shops by myself and hanging out with my grown sons.

Life is simple. I'm not lonely (yet). The weight of dealing with 6 years of her cheating being gone is so freeing. I had no idea how that was affecting me, but now that it's gone, I finally have peace. Oh yes, cheating is definitely abuse.

Last edited by maincourse99; 10-23-2012 at 02:04 PM.
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-23-2012, 02:02 PM
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

6 years of cheating? Did I miss that previously ? How many affairs did she have ?
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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-23-2012, 02:36 PM
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

I remember your post ... I'm happy for you. Her Karma is going to be a B1tch.


"If more people were judgmental, then maybe there would be less infidelity"
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-23-2012, 03:01 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

Yeah, once 6 years ago, the 1.5 years after that. I knew nothing back then. She was very sorry both times, our daughter was very young. I just sucked it up and carried on. Then I discover cheating from middle of last year, so I have no idea the true extent of it I'm sure.If only I knew then what I know now.....
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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-23-2012, 03:24 PM
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

Hoping the best for you.

This kind of cosmic dumbassery occupies a temporal plane of ineptitude and lack of reason so profound a Zen master could spend a lifetime meditating upon its philosophical consequences.
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-23-2012, 06:21 PM
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

Embrace the gift you will soon have. The opportunity to rebuild your life without a cheating spouse. Make the best of it. Happiness, post divorce, does exist.

All the best
WD
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-23-2012, 09:01 PM
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

Her Karma is going to be a B1tch
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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-25-2012, 08:49 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

Thanks everyone for the encouragement
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-25-2012, 09:03 AM
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

Sorry to hear about your plight, MC! Man! That's 6 years worth of itch that she was trying to have feverishly scratched by someone outside of the marriage bed!

I'd say that she's truly beginning to reap the fruits of her labor!

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-25-2012, 10:06 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

Her Karma is going to be a B1tch


I am not rooting for her to be successful. Maybe if she suffered 1/2 as much as me I might be happy.
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post #11 of 11 (permalink) Old 10-25-2012, 10:58 AM
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Re: Sent the STBXW divorce paperwork/agreement

You can be happy just knowing that she is no longer part of your "happiness" equation.

The best revenge is complete indifference to the WS. Her success or problems are not yours and who cares anyway.
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