Re: Why should I love her more than she loves herself?
For what it is worth... My EX had maybe five affairs that I know of. My son caught her with 2-3 and she told him not to tell... (He is now in counseling as I found this out a couple of weeks ago) She stole from me, lied to me, cuckolded me, just about anything wrong you could do to your enemy she did to me.
I still care about her and I don't. I let her go. She is doing my neighbor now. (More counseling for the kids) I don't care about what she does because it is her decision and I do NOT want her back.
I care for her as I would care for any human being now. I don't know everyone's personal stories. I do know hers though the past year is blank... The point is I hop she gets better and I am more familiar with her story so yes it interests me. I think her life is taking a sad turn. Well that is her choice, but I only care as much as it affects the children. If she would ask for help, I would point her to some places where I got help but I would not lift a finger to help her as I couldn't trust her to not try and use me as she did before.
You shouldn't stop caring about her because she is another human being that you know pretty well. You need to stop caring for her like she is your wife... That person is sadly gone.
Be strong, find and interest and get busy living. Life is too short to dance with ugly women!