Why wallow is sarrow? - Talk About Marriage
Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity.

View Poll Results: What to do when cheated on?
Dump them. Move on. 3 100.00%
Counseling. 0 0%
Just not give an F***. 0 0%
Wallow in sadness? 0 0%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 3. You may not vote on this poll

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post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:27 PM Thread Starter
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Smile Why wallow is sarrow?

Reading the cheating section I am confused by a few things.

1. After the first time why deal with it? Drop her find someone new. Doesn't matter drunk, gender, communication, ect. I don't see matter man or woman you shouldn't have to put up with a cheating spouse, even if you have kids.

2. Why let them risk your lively hood? They could give you an STD. It's no secret on here that I have HIV. If I found out a future GF/W is cheated on me (EA and kissing included), shes gone. I could have very bad repercussions that could have an immediate impact on my health such as but not limited to liver failure, stroke, and even another stain of HIV I can't fight (and death). Along with depression that is shown to weaken my immune system.

3. Of course the breakup is gonna suck still doesn't mean you should have any sympathy, empathy, or regret for what they or you did in the relationship (some exceptions apply). I am not saying being completely apathetic just walk out with a smile and the biggest relief off your shoulders. If you have a GF/BF drop her start going out and living a happier life. If you have a W/H your going to have a period of feeling like crap regardless. After that live life up or spend more time doing awesome stuff with your kids.

It may be that I am to young to understand completely, and I know I am missing a few points about money and living, but I have applied this to other, even flimsy, non- romantic relationships and it seems to work.

If someone gives you BS its not your fault, its not your problem, and let them cry, walk away with a smile and never look back.

Any other thoughts?

Thank you!

Last edited by Buckeye; 01-30-2013 at 10:38 PM. Reason: Typo.
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post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:27 PM
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Re: Why wallow is sarrow?

Yea. I don't think you get it.


Real women don't want flowers and chocolate.
They want vodka and Taco Bell.
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post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:30 PM Thread Starter
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post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:40 PM
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Re: Why wallow is sarrow?

I agree Buckeye! And I am sorry that your POSXW gave you such an awful disease. That's adding injury to insult, not the other way around.
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post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:42 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Why wallow is sarrow?

Sorry for my grammar issues. But I have never been married. I got it from my mother. What I meant to say was: Someones else could have their life in danger in the event that I accidentally gave my GF/W HIV and she cheated on me.
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post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:47 PM
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Re: Why wallow is sarrow?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Buckeye View Post
Sorry for my grammar issues. But I have never been married. I got it from my mother. What I meant to say was: Someones else could have their life in danger in the event that I accidentally gave my GF/W HIV and she cheated on me.
Nonetheless, I am very sorry you contracted that disease. Did you know you had it when you gave it to your GF?
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post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:49 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Why wallow is sarrow?

Ugh, it's supposed to be GIVE not GAVE. Future tense.

I have an English disability, sorry....
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post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:52 PM
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Re: Why wallow is sarrow?

No you are fine...well I get what you are saying as far as, why put up with cheating what so ever?...My husbands PA was a deal breaker all around...
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post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 10:58 PM
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Re: Why wallow is sarrow?

Buckeye - I think you are too young to grasp what it means to have a long-term relationship disrupted by infidelity. I'm not saying your advice isn't sound - it is. But it's not realistic.

It's not as black and white as you think - and gets even more complicated when kids are involved.

As well, many BS are loyal (which is why THEY didn't cheat when the marriage got difficult). So many (me included) had an attitude of not giving up. Of course, it was counter-productive to fight for something your WS doesn't want - but the emotions, memories, and love that a BS has/had makes clear thinking impossible.
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