Betrayed & Devistated
Hi. I'm hoping talking about this will help me get through it. I was seeing a man for the past year, I fell in love with him like I've never loved anyone before, he was an amazing person, strong, responsible, a wonderful father, an amazing lover & friend... We had made planns to move in together & combine our families. He has three beautiful children & i have one. I was ready to spend the rest of my life with this man.
I recent found out that back in March he met a girl, & I say girl because she is 20yrs old, (he is 35) who he began a relationship with on the side.
In August of this year we took all the kids & his mom & went on a family vacation for a week. He was distant & rude & I couldn't understand why. After we came home he stopped calling me, & i found out his kids were with their grandma for a week & he didn't tell me. During this week I went down to get some things from his house & found all the doors lock, both his vehicles in the drive & through the kitchen door window i could see piles of clothing, women's shoes, pants, & underwear beside his shorts, shoes & softball jersey. I was histerical & tried to get in I called his phone & he didnt' answer. I didnt' hear from him until the next day & he came up with a story that he wasn't there & it was his friend's girl & his friend's cloths. I wanted so bad to believe him so i did. But we've been rocky since breaking up for about a month & a half & recently he started calling me again tellling me he still loves me & can't live without me & wants me to come back & live with him.
So I started talking to him again & the other night stayed with him @ his house & i found his phone & curiousity got the best of me & i found txtz from this girl. She said she loved him & she talk about the sex they had & how they were when he was still dating me. I got in contact with her & she confirmed my story. She told me they'd been seeing each other since March.
I feel sooo stupid & sick to my stomach. I'm a good person & I truely believe people to be genuinely good & I've never had this kind of thing happen to me. I dont 'know how i'll ever trust another man & I'm still so in love with this disgusting man. It's a hurt unlike any other & I wish it would just go away. How can I learn to get past this. I can't seem to forgive myself for being so naive & trusting.
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