Worst day of the year for me. He is at work Christmas Party

Orangerose · 12-18-2009, 05:04 PM

He is not home yet, 6:00 pm. The party started at noon today.
She is there, the one he had an emotional affair with two years ago. Feeling scared

jessi · 12-18-2009, 05:11 PM

hey don't worry so much, did he say he is over her?

Orangerose · 12-18-2009, 05:14 PM

Yes. But he said (last night) he did not have a lot in common with most of the people he works with. There are only a couple of people he can talk to. She is one of them.

jessi · 12-18-2009, 05:15 PM

you just have to believe in him and trust what you have

Orangerose · 12-18-2009, 05:15 PM

He is not real happy at work. I think he is lonely there. But it is a
job.

jessi · 12-18-2009, 05:17 PM

I know it's a tough deal when they work together, there is a lot of doubt that goes along with that, I'm in the same boat but mine was a PA with a woman he works with......tough to watch him go to work every day

Orangerose · 12-18-2009, 05:27 PM

I'm doing really well after two years except on this particular day.
I do pray every day that she will get a new job.

Atholk · 12-18-2009, 05:31 PM

I think it's a reasonable expectation that he gets home. Just call him and say "look its been 6 hours, you know this is hard for me, please come home".

Orangerose · 12-18-2009, 05:46 PM

I just sent him the text.

Atholk · 12-18-2009, 05:53 PM

It's one thing to be paraniod and checking up on him and grilling him about his every move. Don't that is just going to drive him crazy and away from you.

But when he's going into a obviously potentially risky encounter with a prior OW present, I think asking for that to be controlled is only fair.

cody5 · 12-18-2009, 07:21 PM

I'm gessing he's home by now. Should have been home a lot earlier. WTF?

Atholk · 12-19-2009, 08:41 AM

Update? Update?

Atholk · 12-19-2009, 09:52 PM

Aw come on - what happened?!?!?

Orangerose · 12-21-2009, 11:17 AM

He replied right away when I sent the text. He gave me an apology for not coming home sooner. He said he understood my feelings. But he said he needed his own friends. I don't have a problem with him going somewhere with friends other than work people. He is always telling me he doesn't enjoy talking to the people at work, (except two, both women, one is her). But planning a bowling outing with work friends soon. I told him I should be able to come. It is not work sponsored. Then he got defensive.

cody5 · 12-21-2009, 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Elliemay

But he said he needed his own friends.

I don't get this. Is he referring to these two women as his "own friends" or is he expanding it to mean the entire office party? If the former, it solves nothing. If the latter, that's still a long time w/ no communication when he knows there are issues.

As far as the bowling party, you have every right to know if spouses are invited, how many will be there and WHO will be there. If it's just office and a LOT of them, fine. He still needs to understand he can't be in small social settings with this woman.

I hate to always be paranoid, but something still stinks here.