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The Dating Scene Who says "dating is fun?" It can be, but it can also be very difficult as well. This section is for dating advice.

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Old 11-16-2008, 01:40 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default boyfriend and marriage

I am a 23 yr old female who has been in an exclusive relationship for 6 years (we were 17 when I met and he 18). We have both gone to college and now I am going to graduate in a few months. He has applied to graduate school and may have to travel out of the country to get his education (with several visits back to the States during the year). We have discussed this and agree that we can stay together. However, now he may not be going and may need to change his career all together. My problem is, I am going to be finishing my graduate school degree and will be ready to start my life in a few months. We have discussed marriage and have said we want to spend our lives together, but he has yet to pop the question. He says he doesn't want to get married right now b/c of school. I agree, but I feel as though I need a promise in order to stay with him. We have gotten into a fight over this once before, about a year ago, and almost broke up. I don't want to wait another 3 or 4 years to get a ring but I don't know what to do or even how to discuss it with him at this point. As bad as it may sound, I don't want to (for lack of a better word) waste my time only to find out 3 years down the road that he doesn't want to be with me. Does anyone have any advice? I am actually a student in a counseling program but when it comes to my own problems, I need the help of an outside source that is not biased to the situation.
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Old 11-16-2008, 07:08 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: boyfriend and marriage

Well if you know you want to get married now, and he doesnt, then i think you need to hold off. You dont want to push him into anything he's not comfortable doing.

Respect that you two want different things right now, and that's ok. You can still keep in touch and maybe you will get back together when the time is right for you both.
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Old 11-16-2008, 11:54 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: boyfriend and marriage

I agree. Just split it up and see how things go on your own. Maybe then he'll get the message that you are serious and he needs to be, too!
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Old 11-20-2008, 12:03 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: boyfriend and marriage

let him finish school and figure out his life. What will two more years really be? If you broke up with him and found another guy how long until he popped the question and married you? You guy is making sure he can do the right thing.

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