Re: How to morn and stay married?
I am curious to see how you are doing now, but it takes at the very least a year to get back to normal in life let alone in your relationship. When my Daddy passed, he was in a motorcycle accident, I spent months waking up every night sobbing. I would start crying in my dreams to the point where it would wake me. Sometimes it woke my husband, too, sometimes not...
It's been three years now, and it still hurts. I still wake up crying every now and then. My Daddy for me was like your brother for you - we were the same person and we understood each other the way no one else really could and he was far too young. The longer he's gone, the more pronounced his absence is in some ways, less in other ways.
Just know that you can't expect things to just, go back to normal. It's a long process... something like healing, but more like coping with things being different and learning to deal. I assumed things would just go back to normal, I even went back to school, and I wish I could go back in time to tell myself to take the semester off and to take the time I needed to grieve.
Just be forgiving of yourself and be open with your husband - my husband is very regretful of the fact that I spent a lot of time crying alone rather than reaching out to him to allow him to support me. Just understand that there are times when it is okay to allow yourself to be held and comforted and that you don't always have to appear strong when you aren't feeling strong, especially to the person closest to you in your life, your husband.