Re: Death of my daughter
First of all I want to say I am very sorry for what you are going through.
When I was 16 I became pregnant. I was scared but very excited. My boyfriend left me because I refused to give the baby up or abort.
When I went in at the 20 check up/gender ultrasound the doctors noticed something was very wrong. I was sent to a specialist for the next day. I showed up nervous and had another ultrasound and sadly my daughter (found out that day my baby was a female) had passed away in uetero. I was devastated and alone.
I had to wait 5 days to go in the hospital before the induction was started. 30hours later my daughter was born. I had some complications and had to have a lot of medication. I wasn't ever able to see my daughter or hold her.
The reason I am sharing my story is so you understand that you are not alone.
I thought for years that I was "ok" or "handling" things fairly well considering...but I wasn't. My relationships with my family and friends suffered. I lost a lot of weight, did drugs, drank and basically went off the deep end.
I never sought help for my daughters death until I got married. I am now 24 years old ...its been 8 years since she passed and it still hurts but after seeking help from a counselor and meeting other women who've lost their babies I learned to draw strength from their support.
My advice is don't think or even try to "get through this" on your own. You are allowed to be pissed, hurt, sad, even relieved whatever you feel is valid and it should be expressed.
Please don't push seeking help off as long as I did. I was suffering from PTSD and severe depression and its taken a long time to get through it but I am much happier now.
On the issue of the puppy...I agree that getting a puppy right now was probably not the best idea...but in your husbands defense he very well might have thought this would be a welcomed distraction from the loss. Men and women handle miscarriage and still births differently..but the only way you are both going to know where the other is coming from or how you are feeling is to communicate openly and honestly about it. And I highly suggest you both seek some support of some kind to help you mourn and help you move forward together.
If you ever need someone to talk to ...I am always here...please feel free to private message me anytime.