If you were against Counselling but eventually went along - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
Experiences in Counseling Have you been through professional marriage or relationship counseling? Are you considering it? This section is for topics related to seeing a therapist.

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post #16 of 18 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 12:32 PM
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Re: If you were against Counselling but eventually went along

Originally Posted by Advocado View Post
You're right about walking away and I hope you'll be "there" soon.

Great to hear your daughter is doing so well. Just be sure to enjoy every stage - they grow up so quickly.
Our daughter is our pride and joy......it's hard to think a child could get more love than we give her. She is growing up fast, but we wre loving every minute of it.

Regarding getting there......we'll see. Part of me thinks what harm could they have done to others as well and it should at least be investigated.

Right now I have let it go for a little while, and my daughter doing so well helps.

I am waiting for one final set of files before having all the information. I will then seek legal counsel from several attorneys....mainly to find out the process, how public it might get etc. at least to make sure I am fully informed before making a final decision. They should be sued and held accountable, but my greatest fear is having something in the paper or online with our name and DCF. I don't need someone googling me or the wife and that coming up....that alone would be VERY damaging reputation wise and not good for either of our business.

I hear DCF.......and I immediately think guilty, and I'm sure everyone else does too.

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post #17 of 18 (permalink) Old 01-30-2013, 02:35 PM Thread Starter
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Re: If you were against Counselling but eventually went along

ATC529R - Yeah - the no smoke without fire thing often prevails, right or wrong.

FWIW I think you are going about things the right way, taking legal advice and all before you jump.
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post #18 of 18 (permalink) Old 02-18-2013, 10:15 AM
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Re: If you were against Counselling but eventually went along

Sometimes approaching couples work as skills training/coaching can be more acceptable to a hesitant spouse. I've worked with many couples in which one partner feels they have no issues and/or a therapist has no place in their private issues. I am able to give them the tools to help the eventual private conversations go well.

Approaching it as an interest in improving your ability to communicate, resolve conflicts, and really understand your spouse so that, as you begin to discuss and work through your issues privately as a couple, you are doing so/starting from a better place with strong skills (so that the conversations may actually be helpful.)

And, by participating in skills training with a professional, a hesitant spouse is also able to experience what it is really like in the room, which often helps to relieve some of the mistrust or anxiety about couples work.

Sarah Schmermund, MA
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