Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Southeastern USA
Re: Husband refuses counselling...
I was the one ready to walk in my marriage. I was D-O-N-E, done. A one-hour session with a marriage counselor would not have been much help at that point but my husband and I agreed to give it one last shot before calling it quits.
We went to a 3-day marriage workshop run by the Family Dynamics Institute called "A New Beginning". The organizers state a 75% success rate. It isn't cheap (around $2K) but they offer payment plans and will work with you if you can't afford it.
The workshop is based on the work of a number of popular programs: John Gottman's 7 Principles of Making Marriage Work, Willard Harley's His Needs/Her Needs. And even a DiSC personality profile was included. The weekend was very beneficial in getting us started down the right path and it was a heck of a lot cheaper than a divorce after 20+ years of marriage. We are talking and working through our issues. Things aren't perfect but they have improved to the point that we both feel we have a future together.
Here's what convinced me to go to the workshop: even if it didn't work to save my marriage, it would be well worth it in terms of what to do (and what not to do) to make any future relationship successful.
Good luck to you aquajay.