 How to deal with this....
Hey everyone,
After reading a few of the other posts, I think this might be the right place to post my problem (s). First of all thank all of you in advance for any advice or input. Well, I will come to the problem.
My wife and I have been married for 9 years now, we have 5 great children, of which I brought one into the relationship ( my oldest son) and She already had my stepdaughter (which is the oldest girl (14) ). Our marriage has always been turbulent throughout the years, but never as bad as it has been in the last 2 years. I have been dealing with all kinds of accusations, that vary from cheating, stealing all the way up the the unspeakable,....well I come to that later.
I got injured in the Army 3 years ago with a traumatic brain injury & PTSD, and have been unable to work for the last 2 1/2years. Which lead me to believe that all our problems in our marriage has come from my side, due to all the changes in lifestyle we had to go through since my injury. Physical & psychological. So in other words, I've blamed myself for all the problems. But throughout the last year there had been a few incident that left me doubt my selfblame. It started with my wife accusing me of having certain interrests in my stepdaughter, since I stepped up for her at times, when my wife had one of her bad days and was yelling at her for no real reason. It felt like she just hit me with a 2x4 after she told me that. I was ready to leave her for good, but I started to think about the rest of my kids and I didn't want them to suffer from that. I love my kids (including my stepdaughter,...and NO, not in that way !!!) with all my heart and would never do anything to would jeopardize their well being. But all the fights, accusations and blame games are getting to be unbearable, and when she accused me of stealing the money out of my sons x-mas card, it just hit me. Why am I here? Life is to short be fighting all the time. We tried counseling not to long ago, but the therapist was sort of an intern and not of much help. I'm tired and just need the assurance that I'm doing the right thing by leaving her. My oldest son (her stepson(10)) has been treated poorly by her also and he's ready to hit the road with me. My problem is that I feel like I'm abandoning my other children and I know that she would start badmouthing me, as soon as I leave. How can I make the best out of the situation, anyone had a similar experience. The funny thing is, I still love her, but I feel like staying is the wrong thing to do......
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