Here is a little personal story that Ive never shared to give you an idea of the impact. Your post and daughter ring true to me.
my sister and I were abused by our mother. I was raged at for the smallest little thing. To this day, at 37, i remember these instances vividly. I can replay what happened in my mind like a movie on demand. I was choked with a hockey sock because i hung equipment wrong, I was slammed in the face with a book when learning to read because i didnt know a word, i was pinched non stop depending on her mood, the list goes on. These are my childhood memories.
at a very young age I 'plotted' my moms 'death' by means of some silly obstacle course. I actually drew it out. My plan involved scaring her with my lizard, hiding a trip wire behind her so she would fall and bump her head. I can still picture the drawing. The reality is I didnt want her dead I just wanted her gone and my pain to stop. I know this now but as a child I was just simply scared, all the time.
My sister and I wished our parents would divorce so we could live with dad. We were young but talked about it all the time. Thats a horrible burden to put on children.
Fast forward to now. Now, today, I actually resent my FATHER more then my mother. As does my sister. We talked about this just a couple days ago. The reason is because he did not protect us, ever. He knew it was happening and did nothing. I actually called him at work once when it was happening to tell him, yet nothing changed. I felt like he failed me and didnt love me because why else would he allow it to happen. I still dont know these answers but its damaged my relationship with my father. The abuse didnt stop until I was old enough to protect myself, 14, and during one of her episodes I stopped her slap from connecting, looked her in the eye and told her to never fvcking touch me again. Thats the day it stopped and i remember it like yesterday too.
There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that it has impacted me as an adult and im just now working through that.
There are consequences here that are MASSIVE for your little girl. YOU are all she has my friend. I wish my father walked straight up to my mother and just said what I had to at 14 years old.