WHEN to tell kids & other family members about separation? - Talk About Marriage
The Family & Parenting Forums Family dynamics can be exactly that - dynamic! Post here about family related issues such as parenting, blended families, step-families, new relationships with children involved, family of origin issues, in-laws or sibling issues.

User Tag List

LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
post #1 of 1 (permalink) Old 01-24-2017, 12:50 PM Thread Starter
ResignedWife's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 87
WHEN to tell kids & other family members about separation?

My husband and I have decided to file for legal separation sometime in the next several months. As stated in my original introduction thread on another forum here, it will be an amicable divorce as we are still friends and the separation was 100% a mutual decision and not due to any foul play by either party.

We have two kids, in middle school. Telling them will be hard because my husband and I are conflict-free. We do not fight, do not have outward-showing problems with each other. We've just grown apart and the type of love we have for each other is not the kind that should keep two people married. That's it, plain and simple.

We plan on putting the house on the market around June, once school ends. So we'll still be living together as a family unit up until the time the house successfully closes and we can buy separate properties from the sale proceeds.

But I wonder WHEN we should tell the kids that we are separation? I know HOW we should tell them - I've read all the articles on telling them together (no problem), not assigning blame (there is none), that they are loved (they are), it's not their fault (it's not), not getting over-emotional about it, etc.

After the first meeting with the mediator (next month)?
When we begin packing up the house to get it ready for sale?
When we're finally ready to put the home on the market (around the time the school year ends)?

Secondary to that - HOW did you tell your extended families of the impending separation? Our families think my husband and I are a model couple (that's what happens when you and your spouse never argue or disagree about anything and all the in-laws get along with each other).

ResignedWife is offline  
Sponsored Links

Quick Reply

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.

User Name:
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:


Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Separation is Approaching A Year Now/Feels Like Abandonment arbitrator Going Through Divorce or Separation 633 03-31-2017 08:56 AM
Tips for Helping a Senior Family Member Live Independently VS Glen Home Page Feature News 0 10-31-2016 01:47 PM
First Post - Need help, *long Post* MrW General Relationship Discussion 92 10-12-2016 02:19 PM
I hate our neighbors. H and I can't agree on how to handle them. kag123 General Relationship Discussion 26 05-03-2016 05:39 PM
Day one of Separation. RainbowStars Considering Divorce or Separation 15 12-03-2015 04:10 PM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome