[wiigirl]

Originally Posted by Hope1964

If I had a husband who was hitting my kids, yelling at them, and never spending any time with them, I would leave him. That is not the kind of person I could have any respect for, let alone live in the same house as.

This AND counseling for EVERYONE!

[Gaia]

If my H ever bapped any of our kids upside the head... I'd turn around and whack him upside his head then tell him to get the eff out..... I wouldn't tolerate THAT crap! Am so glad my H isn't like that...

[Cogo123]

It is really sad because I know what he is doing to my son isn't healthy for him. As time has progressed I have started askig him questions after he does something stupid like "did your mom or dad treat you that way growing up?" I know the answer is no. He just looks at me almost like I am being over protective and kindve laughs it off. I have to make a decision but why is it so hard for me to do so?
Its almost like I want something like a CPS situation to happen because I am not sure he will truly everbthink he is wrong until someone of authority shows him the err of his ways.
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[Gaia]

Cogo... as the wife and mother... you have plenty of authority to show him the err of his ways. Is he abusive toward you?

[Cogo123]

Abusive is a harsh word.....he doesn't pay the kind of attention to our relatonship he needs to. He is getting better but not where he. Should be. He is very controlling. He gets upset if I tell him something he doesn't to hear & he pouts like a 2 yr old. Hard worker @ work.
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[Gaia]

Have you considered counseling for the both of you? Or rather... all of you? Family counseling, marriage counseling and perhaps individual counseling?

[Cogo123]

I went to couseling by myself to learn what I could do to help the situation. I only wet for about 4 sessions and the I told him about since he was curious where I was for an hr once a week. He told me I didn't counseling. That was a waste of $. I felt belittled and I was hurt. I stopped going because it started to cost too much $.
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[Gaia]

A few here have recommended trying at universities as counseling can be provided there for little to no cost if your interested.

[Cogo123]

Good idea.....thank you
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[Gaia]

yqw

[EleGirl]

If your son routinely does not finish dinner, give him smaller portions. He can always get seconds.

[rj700]

How was he with discipline for your older boy? Same, less intense? Hitting & yelling too?

[Cogo123]

He was the same. Maybe a little worse with him. He didn't know how to control him since he was a kid and they can be challenging to raise. My oldest is now 18. He is very nervous. He always looks to please his Dad and can't seem to relax. He doesn't know how to cope with difficult situations. Not sure if that's because of him or just his personality.
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[Hope1964]

That's because of your husband. Your husband is abusive, physically and emotionally.

Why are you putting up with it?

[costa200]

Originally Posted by help305

I have a ADHD child and he was out of control while young, I had him on medication which he lost 10lbs. my husband said no more medicine, and started dicipline he would correct and not let anything slide, as he got better and better. Now my son is an Air Man and has very good morals. I couldn't ask for a better son.

That's because ADHD is the most misdiagnosed child disease. There are almost no real cases of ADHD and those that do exist are extreme. I'm pretty sure my parents would never raise a child with fake ADHD. Neither would I. In fact, as a teacher i've had some of those fake ADHD in class and as soon as they understand what rolls in my classroom they are healed while inside my classroom. They resume their ADHD in other classes and at home. What does that mean?