Please help. What do I do???
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Old 03-03-2012, 10:03 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Please help. What do I do???

Hi everyone. I really need some help here. I'll give you the brief rundown. My wife and I have been married for 1 1/2 years. We've been together over 5. My wife is 37 years old and I am 27. I'm sure you can see where this is going...

Before we got married we talked casually about children. I have never wanted to be a father. I know that sounds selfish but it's my life and I'm allowed to feel that way if I want. I don't want the added stress financially, emotionally or in any other form. I'm actually proud of myself for being so honest with myself. I personally don't like children. Never have. I'm incredibly dedicated to my career and have become extremly sucessfull. My wife has recently told me I need to either get on board with giving her a baby or we need to go our seperate ways. I think she is being a little selfish. She chose to be single in her late 20's and early 30's before meeting me. She claims she has always had a strong desire to be a mother and I'm wondering if thats so true why she chose to not get married until she was 35. One of the reasons I loved being with her other than the obvious is because I kind of always thought at her age she kind of accepted the fact she was past her fertile years and on board with my opinion on it. Well now she is coming at me full steam. She recently has taken herself off birth control and is constantly pressuring me to have sex all the time. We have not been fighting for the past 6 months up until this. Now it seems like every day we fight about our stances. I don't know what to do. I love this woman more than anything but I know if I give in and give her a child I will regret it for the rest of my life and I'm afraid I will be miserable. Part of me wants to think she is giving me an ultimatum and not going to follow thru on it. If I leave, shes 37 and single. How could she ever meet someone, get married, and get pregnant in time before its almost impossible? I'm very hurt by everything going on. I never imagined being divorced at 27 but I think its apparent my stubborn wife might be making that a possibility. She does not listen to my opinions on this at all. She quickly shuts me down and turns it into a fight and tells me to either give her a baby or move out. I'll be devestated if we break up and I'm worried about how I will handle it personally. But I'm also afraid that she is being way too stubborn for her own good and if we stay together she could resent me for the rest of my life. I'm devestated by whats going on here. Someone please help!
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Old 03-03-2012, 11:53 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Please help. What do I do???

It is time to go your separate ways. She wants children, you don't... Doesn't matter why, it just is, and appears to have been that way from the start.
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Old 03-03-2012, 11:56 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Please help. What do I do???

P.S. your wife is NOT past her fertile years. Many women today are having children in their late 30's.
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Old 03-04-2012, 05:19 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Please help. What do I do???

My W is 11 years older than me, and she gave birth to our wonderful, beautiful daughter at age 40!

But we both agreed on children and how many, we agreed on everything, down to who will speak which language to her-W is Korean, so our daughter is naturally bilingual.

But it sounds like you can't agree on children, and that is a sound reason to leave each other.
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