[lifeisbetterthanalternat]

My daughter is being christened. We are planning a small gathering at a resturaunt following the church. My cousin and Mom’s god daughter is turning 36 the next day. My mom wants to bring a small cake to celebrate and sing happy birthday. My wife thinks that this is inappropriate. I don’t see the big deal. She says it is my “her day” (my daughter). She is 4 months old…what does she care. Niether of our families are huge into rigid rules about doing things a certain way. Should I be more understanding? Should she be more flexible?

I should also explain that my cousin lives far away. There would not be any other opportunity to celebrate her birthday.

[Gratitude]

I would leave the day just for the christening. Your wife wants to make it a special day just about your daughter, not combine the two. I'm sure the birthday celebrations could be done the next day on her actual birthday or at another time.

If it was my daughter, I would want the same thing as your wife.

[Hope1964]

I myself don't see the big deal with combining the two, but at the same time, if someone else had a stronger opinion and didn't want to combine them, that wouldn't be a big deal to me either.

Because it's your wife vs your mom, you know you have to side with your wife right?

[SunnyT]

Ya, I would rather combine them all....

but she's your wife. She has to get points just for that.

Can't y'all do the cake thing back at the house, later ...after the christening dinner?

[Hicks]

Your wife's reaction is very typical of a first time Mom. It's slightly funny from the outside looking in, but very real to her. You have an opportunity to maintiain your wife's love for you and her sexual desire toward you by standing up for her need on this against your mother.