Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop
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Old 09-10-2009, 10:44 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

I need some advice on something. I discovered that my 8-year old daughter has been visiting pornographic websites on her laptop. She has done this in the past before she had her own computer and I thought the issue had been addressed. She appears to have a strong curiousity about this at an alarmingly young age. She has an older sister who is 10 years old but has never done this, so it she isn't being influenced by her.

She's very much afraid for my wife to find out and I had a discussion with my daughter yesterday about it and I MAY have it under control, but I'm not convinced. I don't know what she has actually seen but I'm assuming it's everything imaginable. I'm just concerend that this curiousity could lead into more mature actions later at not such a later age! I don't want my daughter growing up too fast! Morality is a big deal in my household and I grew up in a strict Christian environment. I'm just not sure how I should handle this aside from placing parental locks on her computer and just having an additional conversation with her to determine where the fascination is coming from, what she saw, and what she thinks about it. She was very embarrassed about it yesterday and got very upset, even suggesting that I take her computer away (which she loves!), so it sounds almost like it's something she can't control. How could an 8-year old girl have an addiction to porn!?!? I feel like I should share this with my wife as well, I know she won't go off the deep end about it, so that should probably be my first course of action. However, my daughter appears to be more comfortable talking to me about it than to her mother, go figure...

And by the way, our girls are not surrounded by this type of material. We do not have any pornography in the house and my wife and I are very discreet about our intimacy, so the girls' exposure to this must be coming from school. Yikes, I didn't know what most of that stuff was until 6th grade, she's in 3rd!
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Old 09-10-2009, 11:06 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

Put netnanny on your PC, talk to her about it and be done with it...it's not the end of the world.

There are worse things...so lighten up

Preacher
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Old 09-10-2009, 12:36 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

Thanks guys, I will look into the PCNanny thing. I know it may not be a big deal now but I don't want it to turn into one later on down the road, that's all. Thanks again!
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Old 09-10-2009, 01:06 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

If i were you I would have a serious talk with your daughter.

explain to her that porn is not "real sex" that is not how mommy and daddy do it.

talk to her about sex the dangers of it, STD's Pregancy, etc.

She is curious about her body, but she needs to realize that porn is not real sex.

show her what a condom is explain to her birth control, etc.

Tell her that sex is a tool for love and that is how it should be used.

I would imagine someone is watching it in your house or a friend of hers. Netnanny is a good one, but besides blocking it, educate her, she is curious and you ahve to let her know that porn is not the answer, that real love making comes from the heart and soul.

This is the time to step up tot he plate, she is curious about her body, show her it is a good thing, with the right person, just not any person.

your at a crucial time in her life, educate her before it is to late and she learns from some boy.
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Old 09-10-2009, 03:39 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

Thanks GASoccerman, sounds like good advice. I don't want to beat this thing to death with her, but I do want to be clear that the images she saw are not necessarily typical of what a married couple do, and that it is inappropriate for her to be observing these things at her age. I just need to remove the curiosity factor by providing her with as much information as she needs at this time. Thanks again!
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Old 09-10-2009, 05:39 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

That is such a big situation. Eight years old girl addicted to pornography. What are you going to do about that? I fear she may be having sex already, with boys a little older than hear. She should go to a medical doctor and also to counseling immediately. Taking the computer away won't prevent anything, she's seen what interests her.

I'll pray for your family.

Secretia
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Old 09-10-2009, 09:37 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

ST,

I appreciate your concerns and prayers. I highly doubt that she has actually done anything sexual at this point, she is NEVER alone with any boys, at school or at home. I believe this to be a case of attempting to find out more about what she may be hearing at school. It amazes me as to how early kids are now learning about this stuff. Thank the internet for this. Kids will often type in the website address and if they are a letter or two off, guess what? They are directed to a porn site. I have done the same exact thing myself. Talking to the school counselor about this may be a better idea, I'll talk to my wife about it first and see what she thinks. Thanks again!
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Old 09-11-2009, 06:52 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

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Originally Posted by mommy22 View Post
You may want a little professional advice on how to tackle it and how you address it in an age appropriate matter. Granted, she is more aware than other kids her age due to the exposure, but you don't want to overwhelm her with details she doesn't necessarily need. Talk with her school cocunselor. The counselor may be able to guide you in the right direction. She doesn't need any details of you and your wife together. She isn't really ready for that IMO. However, I think matters of this nature are best addressed with someone who has higher degrees in child psychology. No, you absolutely don't want to beat it to death or strike any kind of fear in her, but sweeping it under the rug could be equally dangerous.
Her intense curiosity could lead to sex at a much earlier age. Like I said, a school guidance counselor could help or could direct you to someone who could better advise you. The advice you get here is just opinions. You need more than that in regard to something of this nature.
I bought my daughter a book called, ME, MYSELF AND I, do not remember the author, but it explains a lot about their bodies, what to expect and what to do. It might be a good way for you to handle the situation. There are also a lot of books out there to help her with her curiosity, since she seems to have more confidence with you than with her mom, you could do a lot of research and how to talk to her without being an embarassing situation. There is a website called Daughters.com that has a lot of information and another called love and logic.com that has advice on how to handle a lot of situations, check them out you might find other ideas as well.

Good Luck
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Old 09-11-2009, 04:23 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

I was horny at a very young age, no real outside influences to blame the morally deviant behavior on so I guess I was just born that way. My Mom was a very devout christian and didn't even let me have posters of girls in bikinis and sex or perverted thoughts were evil and to be avoided and I ended up being a sexual freak when my hormones kicked in.

I agree with
mommy22 and LaBella on the fact that professional help even if sought out in a book, and no not the BIBLE please,
is not a bad idea.
Morals are good, but be careful that the morals restrictions are balanced with an understanding and respect for "nature".
There are some of us out there that are or were in my case, early bloomers, for whatever reasons, does not make us freaks just because society frowns upon it.
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Old 09-12-2009, 09:39 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

Carmaenforcer,

I appreciate your honesty! I don't think you or my daughter are freaks! Curiosity at a young age is easy to satisfy with the internet, but unfortunately the things she saw I don't believe are age-appropriate. She could be an early bloomer but I just want to keep things in check and strike a healthy balance so that she doesn't get herself into more adult problems too soon. Just being a protective father, that's all. I did not demean or belittle her when I discovered this. She was obviously embarrassed and upset, but it was because I had discovered it, not because of the way I responded to it.

Thanks again!
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Old 09-16-2009, 11:55 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

You sound like a cool parent Mattie J.

I agree that the internet is not the best place to receive your first examples of what sex is.
I also have a daughter (16yo) and a son (18yo) and as so far they haven't exhibited any behavior that is overtly perverse.
Anyway, I feel you on the over protectiveness with them though.

My Son has not even experience one tenth the bad stuff that I had already done at his age and my daughter is more grown up and mature than me. So thank goodness huh.

Good luck with you little girl ok.
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Old 09-16-2009, 03:08 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

Hi Mattie J,

Way back in the days before the so easily accessible internet, I was around 8-9 and stumbled upon my dad's massive porn stash (went way beyond Playboy!)

I had a drawing toy that lit up so you could trace pictures and my older sister, my friend and I used it to trace pictures from porn magazines and make our own porn....our main reaction was 'eeeew gross...look at this'...followed by giggles...there was absolutely no sexual connection for me at that age...it did absolutely nothing for me as I was too young to even get it...it was more of a curiosity than anything.

And btw, it did not cause me to be sexually active at an early age (my ex was my first and he waited patiently for a few years...when I was an adult and ready for that)
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Old 09-16-2009, 10:37 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

Dont be aggressive over her,Just cool down and address the matter to her.Lock the computer.
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Old 09-17-2009, 11:53 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

Quote:
Originally Posted by swedish View Post
Hi Mattie J,

Way back in the days before the so easily accessible internet, I was around 8-9 and stumbled upon my dad's massive porn stash (went way beyond Playboy!)

I had a drawing toy that lit up so you could trace pictures and my older sister, my friend and I used it to trace pictures from porn magazines and make our own porn....our main reaction was 'eeeew gross...look at this'...followed by giggles...there was absolutely no sexual connection for me at that age...it did absolutely nothing for me as I was too young to even get it...it was more of a curiosity than anything.

And btw, it did not cause me to be sexually active at an early age (my ex was my first and he waited patiently for a few years...when I was an adult and ready for that)


I and a few of my cousins a boy and a girl, got into their Dad's porn and it was beyond playboy too, some of it, we were also very young elementary school aged, can't remember exactly.

I think we were also just curious and didn't get anything sexual of of it at that early an age. We all got caught by their Mom, who made them prey and me sit in the living room by myself till my Mom came to pick me up.

I was a late bloomer, not having sex till I was 17, married at 21.
The girl cousin that was there ended up getting pregnant at 12 and the boy got someone pregnant at 17.
The only differences in us was their Mom's making them prey, maybe religion is to blame for the demonizing, making taboo of and so peaking the interest in sexual stuff. Hmmm.
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Old 09-17-2009, 01:27 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: Caught 8 year old girl watching porn on laptop

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Originally Posted by JDPreacher View Post
Put netnanny on your PC, talk to her about it and be done with it...it's not the end of the world.

There are worse things...so lighten up

Preacher
excuse me?????? what are you talking about??? she is 8 years old and visits porn online more than just once.

I'm so sorry to hear that! You should get help for her!! yes at school might be a good idea! Because that could mess up her mind, if it hasn't already. She is only 8. I think you have all right to be concerned!!! Is does not mean that she will get involved in Sex but in Porn and this is as bad as Sex. (at that age)

This is how many people get addicted because they were confronted to porn at an early age!

Last edited by italiana86; 09-17-2009 at 01:36 PM.
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