[phoenix in the sun]

i cant understand why he would want his ex at our Christmas day?

they parted ways and just as iwant to spend the day with the ones i love, he will be inhibited, knowing that she will be there?

the grown kids arents any easier either,

exhausted!

[TNgirl232]

Do you have children who aren't out of school yet? And are you talking about not allowing his older children to come as well? I can 'kind of' understand the ex-wife - but if they are on good terms then why is it a bad thing for her to spend part of Christmas with their kids - especially if they are kids under 18. I do mean part - not there from sunup til the kids go to bed. Maybe you invite her to lunch?

I don't understand if you don't want his kids there (no matter the age) - you are their stepmom now. And when you married him - you got a package and that package includes the kids, ex-wife and even the ex-wife's parents in relation to the kids). One lesson you'll need to learn quick - don't cause a wedge between him and his kids - it will backfire bad on you!

Similar situation I had a 2nd cousin who's exwife came to the big family christmas (cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents) until her boys were in college.