Hello all. This is my first post.
Looking to get some feedback on the below whacky situation.
Here are the specs:
Husband 46 divorced no kids. Professional
Wife 38 first marriage Professional
Neither has major debts and no car loans to pay off.
Both are making similar, decent but not great salaries. They marry, agreeing ahead of time to live in an apartment initially (one of the NYC outerboroughs), have joint bank accounts... paying the bills from the joint checking, and plan to buy a house in 6 months.
Shortly after marrying, the husband closes his bank accounts to open the new joint accounts with his wife and start paying the bills. But the wife then informs her husband that she is NOT opening joint accounts with the husband, and more importantly, will not be sharing the joint expenses with him.
She will pay her bills. He will pay his bills AND their joint bills. Joint bills meaning apartment rent, apartment and auto insurance, when they go food shopping together, go out in general, honeymoon, wedding, etc etc
Forget the issue of the bank accounts. I know many couples do keep their funds separate at least initially.
But regarding the bill paying, who is following normal convention? Should they be sharing the joint expenses or not? Is this arrangement fair to the husband? Is it fair for the wife to have promised one thing and then impose a different thing after the marriage?