Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Calgary, Alberta
I think my husband is getting really depressed since he was laid off...
I thought it might be better to re-post this in this section instead. It relates to finances more anyway....
Me and my hubby Blake have been married for just over 2 years now. He's 24 and I'm 22. We may be young, but we've had a good marriage so far, but lately things have been kind of tense since he got laid off from his job with PetroCanada here in Calgary 8 months ago. He hasn't been himself since. He seems to be getting depressed and not wanting to leave the apartment even. He's put in for so many jobs all over Alberta and the rest of Canada and no one seems to be acknowledging him. He's even put in for some in the US. He doesn't get a lot unemployment benefits & I'm the only one working right now.
Anyway, I came home from work earlier, and I found Blake just sitting on the floor of our bedroom in just his boxers crying his eyes out. I asked him what was wrong, and he just said he was about to get dressed, and he lost it, that he's had enough of not being able to support me and that he feels so low that I'm the only one working and the only breadwinner right now. He said he doesn't know what else to do and that he doesn't think he can go on much more like this. He started saying all this garbage about how he doesn't feel like a man because he can't get a job right now or anything, even though he was in the Canadian Army for 4 years as well. I had a long day at work and couldn't be bothered to deal with it. I just told him to quit b*tching at me about it, and get dressed, shave, and go to the gym or something. He just looked at me, saying what's the point just to sit around and not work all day and he started crying even more, saying I don't understand. I just told him whatever, I don't care and called him a weakling, and he needs to try harder. I just said I've had a long day, and walked out of the bedroom. He started crying out "please don't leave me here Lyds, I need you and I don't know what to do". I went back in later, and he just was laying on the bed asleep. I just laid down next to him on the bed and held him. I hate seeing him like this. I feel so bad now for not being sympathetic and being so mean towards him, I mean I know he's trying, but I don't get why he is this way. I shouldn't have taken it out on him because I had a long day.
It's like he's given up. I don't get why he says he doesn't feels like a man anymore, just because he got laid off and can't find another job right now. I don't think it's really important that he isn't the breadwinner right now, but he claims I shouldn't be the one supporting us both only. I don't get why he collapsed on the floor in his boxers or didn't want to shave either for god's sake, it's pathetic. I love him to death, but I'm getting sick of him feeling so depressed all the time. It seems like he is acting like he is the only guy in Canada who's lost his job. I want him to be like he was when he had a job. He just sits around the apartment all day either looking for jobs or sleeping. He seems really, really bored. He also keeps drawing constantly for some reason. I don't get it. I think he's getting really depressed about everything. I have never seen my baby cry like that before, it was horrifying to me. Even when he was in the military, when I first met him, he was never like this. He's always been so happy, but I never see him smile anymore, and our sex life is starting to suffer too. Even when we go to the grocery store or something, he gets funny at the register, and doesn't like seeing me pay, he just walks off like he's ashamed or something. Again, I know I should have been more sympathetic, and I definitely shouldn't have called him weak, but I don't know how else I can help him.
Last edited by LydiaH; 10-12-2010 at 12:51 PM.