Ugh! Why do spouses think they are entitled to their spouse's inheritance? My husband got a little money from his mom which he spent on family (washer/dryer and paid a few bills off). He didn't have to. I sure the heck appreciated that he did. Then he got a bit of money from his grandmother when she died. I was glad he spent it on himself. He bought himself a new motorcycle. We're in the process of divorce now, but I would never take that from him, even if a judge demanded it. Every time I see it in the garage it makes me happy that he did that. He even named it after her.
The OP went beyond his duties to pay off all of that stuff. His wife should be thrilled.
I have to say i can't understand the converse attitude.
When i stood up and made my vows, in front of my family, they understood that anything they do for me they eould now be doing for us.
I understand the need for the legal differences with inheritances, but in my marriage everything is shared.
OP, you've been married 40ish years you say? If so, surely you would not consider this YOUR money.
That said I think you handled it v well, and paying off debt is almost always a good idea. Especially when you're older and your ability to repay debts from your future wages is diminished.
I don't intend to have any debt other than secured mortgage debt, and even that i want paid off before i hit 50. Inheritances will be a bonus, hopefully at a stage when we're already totally set.
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