Re: Financial Contribution
Personally, we've always just pooled our incomes, with a common plan to increase our collective assets.
My guess is this is the best paying job she's ever had, so she's feeling a bit selfish right now and wants to keep the bulk of her income. This may pass, once she realizes the problem if you do the same thing with your income when it starts to take off. You need to make sure you understand the underlying emotions driving her behaviour.
So, depending how important this is to you, I have two suggestions:
1. Let her keep her "fun" money. It won't be material compared to your earnings in the long term.
2. Set up a proportional system where you each contribute 50% of your income *to the other*, and then make equal payments to your debt, expenses, and investments.
Finally, what are her long term career aspirations? Both kids are in school, so she should be more ambitious than a PT job. You need to have the difficult conversation that, while her income is nice, it's not what carries the household. Perhaps her extra income could go exclusively into retirement savings and you can income split and provide her an allowance? Just some off the cuff thoughts for you going forward.