08-22-2009, 12:32 AM
Join Date: Jul 2009
| | Re: My Husband Uses Me Financially
I'm right there with you...except my husband has 6 kids outside, thankfully none with me (but I do have a small child to take care of), and I don't have to take him to work. I'm upset because on top of his infidelity and lies, I'm the one paying all the bills, when we had agreed to pay 50-50 before getting married.
I don't know if this will work for you, but stop trying to do it all. I no longer do housework, no sex every night, and I'm starting not to cook as much anymore. Not because I'm trying to get back at him, but because I don't have the energy after writing and editing all day to make a living, taking care of a toddler, and trying to keep myself from going crazy. Have him help out more.
Oh, and you will need to talk to him about your financial situation and let him know you can't go on like this, the kind of stress you're under isn't healthy. And if you're not doing well, who's going to provide for and take care of your children? Make sure you know where all the little bit of money he's making is going (it's not enough for him to tell you, start looking at bank statements and pay stubs).