What's the deal with getting "banned"? - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 46 (permalink) Old 01-31-2011, 04:43 PM Thread Starter
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Question What's the deal with getting "banned"?

Not that I'm looking to have it happen to me, of course.

But I see that Conrad is banned, and he's been very helpful to me so I'm hoping it's temporary?

What gets someone banned??
And if they are, can they still receive PM's?


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post #2 of 46 (permalink) Old 01-31-2011, 07:12 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

You get banned for not following community posting guidelines. Usually, it's disrespectful posting. Seems on this forum, though, that banning is temporary. Maybe a week? Another forum I'm on, once you're banned you are gone for good.

~ You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough. ~

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post #3 of 46 (permalink) Old 02-01-2011, 03:24 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

People only get banned when they violate forum guidelines, and it is usually temporary the first time. We progressively make them longer if they continue to violate the guidelines. It's kind of like a 3 strikes / out policy, but we make exceptions.

One exception is brand new users who sign up and immediately start calling people names and posting disrespectful comments. That will usually get them banned permanently.

When it's a long time user, we are a little more lenient.

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post #4 of 46 (permalink) Old 02-01-2011, 05:02 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

I don't really get the "disrespectful" thing. Certainly there is nothing useful about spamming or ads. But one persons disrespect is another person's dope slap. Harsh treatment, oh and a very healthy dispensing of disrespect, went a long way to get through my thick head on another group.

But that is me. This is not my group, and I don't make the rules.
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post #5 of 46 (permalink) Old 02-01-2011, 06:35 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

If someone gets banned for disrespectful posts it's usually very obvious stuff, like name calling, racist or sexist remarks, etc.

We're not going to let the site degenerate into those kinds of arguments, because nothing good comes of them, and they offend many people.

"Reality checks" and differences of opinions are not disrespectful, and should be allowed.

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post #6 of 46 (permalink) Old 02-01-2011, 06:36 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

Different strokes for different folks. It's your group.
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post #7 of 46 (permalink) Old 02-01-2011, 10:20 PM Thread Starter
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

I didn't see anything inflammatory or disrespectful coming from Conrad (mustve missed something), and I got a lot of help and support from him, so I do hope it's temporary.
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post #8 of 46 (permalink) Old 02-01-2011, 11:32 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

Seems most of the mens clubhouse crew has gotten a banishment... So now I feel I choose my words a little more wisely...

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post #9 of 46 (permalink) Old 02-11-2011, 01:47 AM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

I got banned for totally interesting reasons(flirtatious, innocent mistakes), never been rude to anybody. One time I was harshly scolded by my husband, he was shocked that his wife was that silly; one time he laughed out loud because he was not surprised at all, he knows what kind of wife he has. I am notorious! The bans helped me understand what is going on on this site.

I like the strict rules this site has, it helps people behave and show their nice side to people instead of their ugly side, I dislike all the name calling and stupid arguments!

I can't stay at other forums because of the rude people there!

For a short while my husband asked me to find a different forum to go to, he doesn't like it when people are not nice to me! He knows that his wife has a kind heart and all she wants is to help people!

Last edited by greenpearl; 02-11-2011 at 02:07 AM.
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post #10 of 46 (permalink) Old 04-15-2011, 03:18 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

I have just been back from being banned (IDK if greenpearl can do that as a forum supporter but I'm positive it was her if so), when another woman on the same post was being *at the very least* as rude and disrespectful as I was, not only to me but to several others was not also banned. I believe this was because she was siding with the opinion of the individual who posted the 'exemplary wife' topic, who just so happens to be the forum supporter I had already mentioned. This other woman was on an absolute tirade across multiple topics and was never banned, but when I questioned whether I felt it was a good example in parenting to be submissive to your husband and co-dependent I was kicked out for the week. This seems entirely unfair.

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post #11 of 46 (permalink) Old 04-15-2011, 03:54 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

Only a moderator can initiate a ban. I have no idea what your offense was but any time you feel there is a poster being rude please report them. We want the forum to be a place where people can come for advice and not be harassed.

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post #12 of 46 (permalink) Old 04-15-2011, 05:32 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amplexor View Post
Only a moderator can initiate a ban. I have no idea what your offense was but any time you feel there is a poster being rude please report them. We want the forum to be a place where people can come for advice and not be harassed.
Thanks for the info!
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post #13 of 46 (permalink) Old 04-15-2011, 06:40 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

Quote:
Originally Posted by AvaTara539 View Post
I have just been back from being banned (IDK if greenpearl can do that as a forum supporter but I'm positive it was her if so), when another woman on the same post was being *at the very least* as rude and disrespectful as I was, not only to me but to several others was not also banned. I believe this was because she was siding with the opinion of the individual who posted the 'exemplary wife' topic, who just so happens to be the forum supporter I had already mentioned. This other woman was on an absolute tirade across multiple topics and was never banned, but when I questioned whether I felt it was a good example in parenting to be submissive to your husband and co-dependent I was kicked out for the week. This seems entirely unfair.
I posted that thread mainly to help! If you don't like that particular sensitive word, I can't do anything. It doesn't bother me!

By the way, I deleted that thread too! It was such a nice thread, just because of some anger there, I deleted it!

I have learned not to read offending posts or at least not to let them bother me!

TAM is the only forum which bans people who are rude and flirtatious, based on my little experience with Internet and forums!

I love TAM because they have strict rules and they want people to show their nice side rather than their ugly side.

And I have learned, on a public forum like this, you meet all kinds of people! If you have to fight with everybody who disagrees with you, then there will be a lot of fights!
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post #14 of 46 (permalink) Old 04-15-2011, 06:47 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

As I understand, anyone who reads posts & is a member here can report another (if they know how to do it -private message a Mod??) - they may not even be on that particular thread, you just never know.

I Could never be a Moderator because I LOVE all the debating, It really doesn't bother me when people get a little rude, cause someone else will just come back & try to win them over intellectually. I kinda get a charge out of it all. So I would SUCK as a Mod, never getting rid of the flaming posts.

Never wonder if I report you, cause I wouldn't report anyone. Drama on the forums makes it a little fun. I know , I know, this is not a nice example to have, but sometimes I think they are a little too strict. Just my opionion.
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post #15 of 46 (permalink) Old 04-15-2011, 06:55 PM
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Re: What's the deal with getting "banned"?

SA,

Not everyone has the kind of patience and understanding you have! Among people who I know, I think you are the one who gets offended the least here on TAM!

If this forum allowed rudeness, it wouldn't be a place where people can seek advice. I would have disappeared long time ago!

I am not interested in talking to people who can't control their tongue or fingers. People can disagree, but at least be more polite when they disagree. I am happy when people agree with me. I am OK when people disagree with me politely!

Ha ha ha............................this is me!
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