Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's? - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-31-2013, 09:53 PM Thread Starter
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Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

So obviously getting into a verbal war with someone or name calling in forums gets you suspended or banned, but is there more flexibility when it comes to confronting that person in the private messages section?

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post #2 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-31-2013, 10:42 PM
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

I think it's safe to say that, whether talking in a thread on the forum or PM'ing someone, you still need to maintain respect. IOW, you can't call someone a "f*cking a$$hole" on a thread, and you probably shouldn't do it in PM, either... because even PMs can be reported. Just sayin'...

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post #3 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-31-2013, 10:44 PM
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

I think people can be banned over PM, guess it takes the private out if it
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post #4 of 31 (permalink) Old 05-31-2013, 11:25 PM
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Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

I don't understand why it is ever important to get into a verbal war.

One just needs to state their opinion... if one wants to provide some factual information it should be accompanied by a citation.

If you don't agree with another person's opinion no matter how outrageous it may sound, you say as much. "I don't agree with your opinion". and leave it at that. If someone tells you are wrong in an inflammatory manner, just don't respond. It is not worth it.

It is not as if you lost anything. Be the better person and hold the higher ground.

The principle should be for both forum posts and PMs.
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post #5 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 12:19 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

Just asking, because there are a few on here who need and DESERVE a verbal lashing now and then for their rude or obnoxious behavior. And I am not opposed to someone letting me have it in a pm either so I'm including myself as well.

Also, if you decide to go the route of putting certain people on the "ignore" list to take care of it, can you let that person know that they are now on that list so they don't bother responding to your posts any longer. Or will that be subject to a suspension or banning?

Last edited by Cee Paul; 06-01-2013 at 12:25 AM.
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post #6 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 12:23 AM
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

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Originally Posted by Cee Paul View Post
Just asking, because there are a few on here who need and DESERVE a verbal lashing now and then for their rude or obnoxious behavior. And I am not opposed to someone letting me have it in a pm either so I'm including myself as well.
Best to just report them to the moderators. It does not seem worth the trouble to me, but I guess we all have our breaking points.

I would just lend caution using the NFL and NBA situation. It is always the player that retaliates that typically gets called for the penalty or foul not the initial offender.
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post #7 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 09:10 AM
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

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Originally Posted by Cee Paul View Post
Also, if you decide to go the route of putting certain people on the "ignore" list to take care of it, can you let that person know that they are now on that list so they don't bother responding to your posts any longer. Or will that be subject to a suspension or banning?
What makes you think their responses would be for your benefit, rather than giving an opposing view of something? Why would you care, really? You don't like them, you put them on ignore, YOUR problem is solved, in that you don't see their posts except when someone quotes them. Again, I ask...why would you even care if they comment on something you post?

But, to answer your question, no, I don't think telling someone "I am now putting you on ignore" would get you banned... However, it WOULD appear childish.

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post #8 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 09:40 AM
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Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

No matter what someone does here I do not have the right to give someone a verbal lashing nor them to me.

The correct protocol is report obnoxious behavior to the mods and/or put them on ignore.
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post #9 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 10:18 AM
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

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Originally Posted by Cee Paul View Post
Just asking, because there are a few on here who need and DESERVE a verbal lashing now and then for their rude or obnoxious behavior. And I am not opposed to someone letting me have it in a pm either so I'm including myself as well.

Also, if you decide to go the route of putting certain people on the "ignore" list to take care of it, can you let that person know that they are now on that list so they don't bother responding to your posts any longer. Or will that be subject to a suspension or banning?
The only real issue is that if you feel there are people who need and DESERVE a verbal lashing...maybe you need to question whether it's worth it. What are you trying to get across? Do you just not like a certain poster or is it the style or the content?

To get so upset that you would want to verbally lash out at someone in a PM suggests that maybe, and this would be for me at least...that it's time to click the X at the top of the browser.
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post #10 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 11:14 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

Now forming that "ignore" list, so that I can get back to having a good time on here without being constantly trolled and baited by the same 2-3 individuals who are well known for it.

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post #11 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 11:56 AM
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

Just wanted to make sure you knew that they can still post on your threads/to you, even if you have them on your ignore list...as long as they don't "ignore" you in return.And, you will still see posts from them if they are quoted by someone you are NOT ignoring. I learned that from experience.

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post #12 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 12:57 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

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Just wanted to make sure you knew that they can still post on your threads/to you, even if you have them on your ignore list...as long as they don't "ignore" you in return.And, you will still see posts from them if they are quoted by someone you are NOT ignoring. I learned that from experience.
Yeah I noticed that with someone that I had to put on there about 3 months ago.
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post #13 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 01:00 PM
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

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Originally Posted by Cee Paul View Post
Just asking, because there are a few on here who need and DESERVE a verbal lashing now and then for their rude or obnoxious behavior. And I am not opposed to someone letting me have it in a pm either so I'm including myself as well.

Also, if you decide to go the route of putting certain people on the "ignore" list to take care of it, can you let that person know that they are now on that list so they don't bother responding to your posts any longer. Or will that be subject to a suspension or banning?
Here is the thing.

You can verbally lash out all you want to in PM but if someone chooses to report that PM, all of the moderators see the entire discussion and if it crosses the line into unacceptable, you are subject to a banning.

I also suggest that you quietly place people on ignore. While you absolutely have the prerogative to inform a user politely that you are placing them on ignore, it's mostly just an extra dose of drama that really isn't necessary and again, if a user decides to report the PM, you absolutely may be subject to a banning if the PM breaks the guidelines.

Best bet is to stop, drop the keyboard and walk away for a minute if you are feeling a lashing coming on.
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post #14 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 01:17 PM
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

Hey, if you're making a list, throw my on there please.
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post #15 of 31 (permalink) Old 06-01-2013, 02:34 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Are you all more flexible when it comes to the PM's?

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Hey, if you're making a list, throw my on there please.
You are not one who constantly follows me around firing off sarcastic comments Larry, so you're good.
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