ATLGirl

I have been married for less than 2 years, and from day 1 it was not what I expected. My husband doesn't like to cuddle or even touch me but then expects sex when he wants it. And I could care less. I am completely not attracted to him, and don't really feel in love with him anymore. He isn't interested in talking. I feel like we just live in the same house together co-existing without any meaningful interaction or feelings toward each other. Is this normal or is this a sign that this isn't meant to be? I'm concerned because we are considering having children and we are both getting older and I want children more than anything, but don't know what to do.

nangie29

Wow! If you don't feel in love with him or are not even attracted to him why in the world would you want to have a child with him? Do you think a child would want to grow up in a family with a mother and father who aren't in love with each other and aren't showing each other any affection? I think you need to think back to your wedding day and ask yourself why you married him in the first place and really evaluate your relationship. Kids are great but wait until your relationship is a good strong loving one before adding kids to the mix.

draconis

All a child is going to do is make things worse for the both of you. I think it is important now to decide if the marriage is worth it, you have already wasted two years do you want this for the rest of your life?

draconis

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stav

OMG, don't under any circumstances have children now!

No it's not normal to have no feelings or interaction between a married couple.. You need to seriously consider whether you both should call it a day and start over. Neither of you can be happy in a situation like this. Perhaps you should make an effort to sit down togther and talk about what you both want from life.

bhappy3

WHATEVER YOU DO, DO NOT HAVE KIDS!!!!

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carmaenforcer

That's a tough one.
I am inclined to agree that it's not ideal to have a child with someone if you truly do not love them or are not attracted to them, for the simple reason that this is a long term commitment to raise a child with someone.
I can understand the feeling of urgency to make things work with "the one your currently with", especially if your are a woman and you feel like the clock is ticking on reproducing. You really should strive to have children with someone that you can stay with to offer that child a stable loving environment to grow up in with the benefit of having both parents around to help raise him or her.

Communication is the first step, either to just break things off as soon as possible or to see if the problems you are having are correctable and simply obstacles. Is your love and attraction towards your husband gone for real or are you just a little disillusioned by your husband not giving you the cuddling you thought you should be getting and expecting sex.

Expectations not being met, will definitely have you rethinking your relationship, but sometimes things can be fixed with just talking about it.