Found a Condom in Husbands Boot
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Old 02-11-2010, 04:11 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Found a Condom in Husbands Boot

About three years ago I was cleaning my husbands closet out and picked up an old pair of work boots that he kept in the back for a back-up pair and a condom fell out. When I asked him about it he said it was from a trip he'd taken to NY to watch a football game with his friends and he must have forgotten to throw it away. That trip was a year or so before and when he came home and I was doing his dirty laundry a condom fell out of his hoody. He said that the guys had bought a box as a joke to tease on guy in particular. That they put them on his doorknob, shaving cream, etc. My husband said that since it was his idea that the guy the pranked decided to get him back by putting several in my husband's suitcase. He said he thought he'd found them all and trashed them before he got home.

I thought his football prank story sounded more like what middle schoolers would do than guys in their late 30's and early 40's. I decided to let it go at that. I also decided to let the story about the condom in the boot go since it had been so long and I couldn't remember if he'd taken that pair with him or not or if it was even the same type of condom's.

We have been together for 18 years (married for 16) and we have never used condoms. That is until recently. About four months ago while we were in the middle of being intimate he stopped and said "wait I've got a condom in the truck, let me go get it". I flipped!!!!

I asked him what the heck he had one in his truck for and the man actually stammered. He finally said for us to use. I sat there in awe as he returned with one ordinary condom. Not a pack and nothing "special" (in it was intended to spice things up). I asked him where the rest of the pack was and he said there was only one. Needless to say the next day I was compelled to look in the truck. I found a pack of condoms tucked in behind the some other items in the door.

It took me a couple of weeks to get my nerve up and to find the right time to ask him about this. When I did he said I was crazy, that there was only the one. Shortly after that he came home with like a box of 40 and has insisted on us using one every time since.

He knows where I'm at every second of the day so he can't be thinking that I'm cheating and he's being safe. Does this behavior absolutely mean that he is cheating?
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Old 02-11-2010, 04:18 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Found a Condom in Husbands Boot

There is a high percentage that he is. Also the sudden change to using condoms makes no sense. It is likely he has or suspects he has an STD. Sit down and demand to know why he feels he needs to wear a condom now and if the answer is not satisfactory stop all sexual contact with him until he gets tested. Way too many red flags here.
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Old 02-11-2010, 04:40 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Found a Condom in Husbands Boot

He said it's because it burns when he urinates and he thinks having relations with me is causing it. He went to a doctor and was diagnosed with a urinary tract infection. He still continues to insist on using them because he doesn't want to get sick again.

I went to my doctor and had a full blood work up to make sure I'm well and everything came out fine.

I told him about my tests and he still insists.
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Old 02-11-2010, 04:42 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Found a Condom in Husbands Boot

Did he tell you he was having burning issues? Did he tell you about the doctor's appointment before he had it? Did he tell you about it before he started using the condoms? Or is he being totally reactionary about this?
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Old 02-11-2010, 06:45 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Found a Condom in Husbands Boot

He had UTI's in the past but I don't remember any around this time. I knew he was going to the doctor for something else and this was an additional issue that he came back with. I don't know if they actually did testing or just gave him the meds.
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Old 02-11-2010, 09:11 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Found a Condom in Husbands Boot

This is sad, and it sounds like you know what the answer is here and it's a tough fact to face. But if you look at the other facts vs. the excuses then you just have to face the situation with a rational mind. He has lied to you about the condoms already, and he's likely lying to you about not using them too.
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Old 02-11-2010, 09:36 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Found a Condom in Husbands Boot

Be very, very careful!! It sounds like he has a little "something" and he does not want to transmit/infect you. This is your husband? In your 18 year relationship you previously did not use condoms? AND you never discuss this as choice of birth control?
Oh yeah, he trying to protect you from something! I am not an urologist, but that UTI excuse sounds far fetched.

PLUS, you already caught him in a lie, with his "stash" hidden in the car. I hate when someone doubts another persons intelligence! ( even with my typos!)
You know the saying "when you go looking for something, then you'll find something"? I suggest "YOU GO LOOKING!"

Good luck and I hope you find ALL the info you need!
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