03-13-2010, 09:59 AM
Join Date: Dec 2009
| | Re: It feels like someone took a knife and stub my heart!!!
I think you might be (based on what /how you wrote) overreacting a bit. After that many years in marriage its not uncommon for one spouse or the other to start "talking" to someone outside. Also be VERY careful about what you're saying. MEANING you're saying that you did so much.. were there for him etc.. BIG question is, were/are you there for him in the way YOU define or him?
Lack of communication seems very apparent and that also is very common in marriage... life sneaks up on you and you get caught up in that and yes...take for granted your spouse.
Dont cry over "spilled milk".. You husband COULD be saying yes.. i dont love you anymore and i want to divorce... THAT would be knife in the heart. Although things are nto "perfect" at the moment, seems you have an opporunity... that is.
Sit around and think about all this knife business or you can pick yourself up and have some candid discussions with hubby, explaining that you want him and you to be totally happy so that he's not drawn to someone else.. Take resposnibilty. Find out what that means for both of you... Dont decide yourself what he needs..ask him..
May be at times that one or the other has to suck it up and drive the relationship back together or closer.. Thats love hun.
IF he's willing, and sounds like he may be... start talking OPENLY. If you're "freaking out", he's probably not likely to be honest. Try some counseling.
I knwo ive responded to a couple other threads of yours and always,,,, responses are based on how you write. Seems here you do have a shot...dont lament over the past... you're both here now.
all the best
DIE TO THE PAST EVERY MOMENT - TWC