saveme4

I have been together with my girlfriend for 2 years and 2 months and i love her to death. We are both freshmen, almost sophomores, in college and recently we have been having some pretty serious problems.

For me they have a lot to do with sex. When we first started going out, ie first year and some months, we had sex a fair amount, maybe 2-3 times a week, and i was happy with that. Now it seems like she will come up with every excuse possible not to, either shes too tired, doesnt feel well, etc. i talked to her about it and that conversation was very revealing. she said she's not turned on by me as much anymore, and that sometimes she is attracted to other guys. Not that she would do anything, though. i feel as if she could go at least a month without wanting any sexual contact with me. she says she feels bad about it and wants to change, but "thats just how i feel" she says.

I also feel like this is the root of all of our other problems, like if we had sex more, i would be less concerned about her talking to some of her ex's, with whom she stays close-ish friends with.

Anyone have any advice or anything please?

rdurham77

honestly bro here is what has worked for me in the past even if it's not working for me right now.
quite wanting it from her
trust me i know thats hard but if you completly lay off the issue entirely then she will begin to wonder whats up
if you can have enough will power to not attempt to have any sexual contact with her at all then she will start wondering why you don't want her anymore and will begin trying to rekindle the flame.......it's tough to do but like i said it has worked for me in the past....i would even take care of the problem myself if you know what i mean before you spent anytime alone together so that you will have less of an urge..this helps to keep you from trying for it because your basic need is fullfilled even if it's not filled the way you want it to be ....1 week 2 tops and she won't be able to resist the urge to find out why you are so offish (you know the way you feel about her right now

hope this helps

saveme4

Thats what i have been doing for a week so far, im gonna go for as long as i can. the problem is she doesnt feel like starting ever. when i tried to set the mood and make a move, she doesnt want to. i have played romantic music and lit candles and kissed her all over and she still said she didnt feel like it.

TWV66

i agree. Beat her at her own game...and if she DOESNT fold.....go play at another table.

GAsoccerman

May I ask what her major is in college?

I dated my wife through college, She was a Pharmacy amjor and it was Brutal, especially now near finals.

Anyway, we had a loose relationship, to the point where is if we were together we were, if not we were not..this took alot of pressure off of both of us.

Your in college, date around, if it's meant to be then it will work out, if not then nothing lost.

saveme4

We are both music majors, but the work load isnt that high for either of us.

I am sure and have been sure for so long that she is the one i want to spend the rest of my life with and i dont want to try to look for anyone else. I know she feels the same way too.

Maybe we're just in a dry spell? Yeah its hard because i kinda equate sex and love and she doesnt really, but in the long run i guess its not that big of a deal, right?