03-20-2010, 02:15 PM
Join Date: Mar 2010
| | I think my marriage is doomed.
I've been married for 5 years and been with my wife for 10.
Last year she cheated on me with her ex-boyfriend. It was a one time affair but she spoke him a little bit afterwards. When she begged me to come back to her I said "only if you never talk to this guy again". Which (to my knowledge) she has not. This isn't the first time, when we first started dating she left me for another man, but that only lasted a few weeks and she begged me to come back.
I have WICKED trust issues now. I feel like I'm an insignificant part of her life and that if we didn't have children she would have just left me. Maybe I'm just here to help her survive financially. I don't even know that I'm doing the right thing by staying with her. I love her to death. I sometimes feel that the kids have a HUGE part of my being with her, but I do love her.
When we got back together, we decided to be completely honest with eachother so that neither of us were secretly unhappy and willing to cheat. (I've been failthful forever).
I've been honest with her and I also tell her she is beautiful (daily) and try to give her compliments every day to help her feel good about herself. .. I too have self esteem issues that are NEVER helped. I've even hinted to her that I need help, and that I feel horrible about myself.. but she doesnt care enough to compliment me on anything.. which makes me feel like maybe she have anything nice to say about me, so says nothing.
I don't know what to do, I feel like I want to leave because I'm so unhappy in the marriage, but I know I'd be so depressed with her and my children around every day.
What should I do? And how do I trust her again?