I need some serious help please. I have been married for 12 years and I am right where this lady is. Emotional disconnect has completed. I am trying to reconnect with my husband but just keep coming up with more and more things that have hurt and I can't seem to stop. As soon as I start making any progress he brings me right back down, then we he makes progress I bring him down with another revelation of missed needs. Is the cycle ever going to stop or should we stop hurting ourselves?
You will need to do what i call a "stop point"
Sit down and stop together. Tell each other your sorry and mean it. Let each other know that you will make mistakes in the future, but remind each other of the love between you.
Love is patient and kind, it is never jealous, love is never boastful or conceited, it is never rude or selfish, it does not take offence, nor is it resentful. Love takes no pleasure in others’ sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope and to endure whatever comes.
Love does not come to an end. There are three things that last... faith, hope and love and the greatest of these is love.
- Because we don't know when we will die, we get to think of life as an inexhaustible well. Yet everything happens only a certain number of times, and a very small number really. How many more times will you remember a certain afternoon of your childhood, some afternoon that is so deeply a part of your being that you can't even conceive of your life without it? Perhaps four or five times more, perhaps not even that. How many more times will you watch the full moon rise? Perhaps twenty. And yet it all seems limitless.
In other words, Do not live your days wondering when one of you will fail again. Instead live each day enjoying your company with one another. Tomorrow may never come for one of you. So do not waste today on small arguments. They will come and go, but always forgive them when they do show up.