Thanks again. Here is a letter that i wrote to my wife and her friend
know we talked bout this yesterday when I came home that you will not leave me …. I just want to reiterate that I am sorry for feeling jealous and insecure about your friends. I do trust you implicitly and I trust Jay Implicitly. The problem I had was that sometimes I do not feel worthy of you. You are wonderful in many ways, You are beautiful, Intelligent, passionate, hardworking, and a social butterfly. You make friends very easy. Sometimes it can be almost overwhelming that you choose me as your husband, out of so many possible suitors. Sometimes I can’t believe my luck in meeting you and having you as my wife. But you are my wife and I want to make you the happiest person alive. I want you to have everything life has to offer. I am asking only one thing and that is patience and understanding as I grow personally. I am meeting new people and learning to be more social. Rome was not built in a day so my learning curve will take time and I will hit a few road bumps along the way (Such as this one). I ask for your patience because I and coming from a style where I am always suspicious ( my military training) of my surroundings. Approx 17+ years of military will have some effect on you. The way I was brought up was to always concentrate on getting ahead; I really did not spend time cultivating close friendships. Over time that began to change and after I met you, I realized the importance of having friends to keep you grounded and centered, also to get a fresh perspective on life. I am a work in process at the moment. Please allow me your patience and the time to change to become a better friend, companion, husband, lover, etc. Please understand that I will go through some growing pains and it will take a little time, for me to achieve my goal. My goal is to become more social, to get out and taste life. I do enjoy relaxing at home, but I realize that I will miss a lot of life by sitting at home. I pledge that I will taste more of live and resovle not to be a hermit. While I still will enjoy relaxing at home, I want to test and push the boundaries of my humanity, to meet people and get to know them that I may help then grow as they will help myself grow.
To Mr. Jonathan Range I also apologize for my behavior. Sometimes people do stupid things and I am no exception. Like I said above. Sometimes I feel unworthy of her because she is so wonderful and she completes me in so many respects, it is scary. I guess what I am trying to say is that I lost confidence In myself and my marriage and if I loose confidence In my marriage, Others will too. I regret that it took me over a month to figure this out and I hope that I can only try to repair the damage done and regain the trust of both of you. I am the one that needs to change, I need to come out of my shell more and I am committed to doing that
Veronica: You are the love of my life, I love you, honor you and cherish you. You have touch my heart in a way no one has. You have broken past the stone façade and found a warm caring individual and you fell in love with that person
Mr. Jonathan Range: I consider you a close friend of mine. You are the first person outside my family to take a interest in me as a person. The guys at my unit were cool, but the majority of them you could not honestly talk to because they had serious issues going on (That is for a longer email). I hope you consider me your friend as well ( an imperfect friend but a friend anyway)
In conclusion… all I can say is that my confidence and trust in myself and my marriage have been renewed (through battle, prayer, reading, and research) and again I am sorry for putting you both through this. I can’t promise that I will not have future brain farts but I will try my best to minimize the hiccups along the way.
“There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, learning from failure. “
William Jennings Bryan: Confidence Quote
The way to develop self-confidence is to do the thing you fear.
Unknown Author: Confidence Quote
The whole world steps aside for the man who knows where he is going.
When i got home, she told me that her friend found it very insightful and he appreciate it and has been and will continue to be my friend. my wife states that she knew that already and that she was not planning on leaving me and that nothing ever happened. I still plan to get counseling to improve myself as a whole so that issues like this will be few and far between. I think things have started to improve and it will improve over time.