05-03-2010, 10:27 AM
Join Date: Sep 2009
| | What does it mean if she will not talk to me about us?
I am very confused about my wife. I feel she no longer loves me but she says she does, yet I feel as if I live with a roomate.
The last 9 years have not been the greatest but I finally have grown up and want to make/fix everything. Since I stopped drinking 9 months ago, I finally feel like I was when i first had first gotten married. Though I am not sure about the wife anymore.
She will not talk to me about us, all I get is yes or no answers. Most of the time it seems like she just wants me to shut up, so she will just tell me yes, to shut me up.
Now she was sick all last week and this weekend so maybe she did not want to talk about us last night, like i wanted to. Yet, I have been waiting to talk about us for a while now and i am tired of waiting. She does not show any interest to talk about us, it seems as if it is a burden to her now.
She tells me last night she did not want to talk about us, another night she says, i told her exactly when cause i am tired of waiting. I told her how about when she feels better, she says i do not know.
To me it seems she is hiding something or doesnt want to tell me how she feels about us. I am tired of feeling like i just live with a room mate. There is no sex, no kissing, ho hugging, no affection, nothing........ I have given her space, i stop asking about sex.
I tell her, all i want to do is make her happy and all i want is for us to be in love again and everything to be how it should be. But I do not feel she feels the same as i do now but wont tell me.
Why does she not want to talk to me about us? its driving me crazy... She tells me, i do not want to talk about that crap right now, then i just think, wow just tell me you dont love me and i will go away but she wont tell me that, she tells me she loves me.
She barley spoke to me saturday or sunday, yet she will get a text message from her friend and she will text a paragraph back to her but yet wont say anything to me, when i do say something it is very short on her answer. I told her last night if you wont talk directly to me we can text since you talk to everyone else but me and she tells me to shut up.
Should i just not even bother anymore, i mean should i just really not give a crap anymore... I feel like just leaving her and seeing what happens. I doubt she would even care or notice..
I really do not want to go back to drinking cause of her but this is driving me crazy. She had told me if I go back to drinking we are over with, i sorta feel maybe she is pushing me back to drinking for me to ruin it all and put the blame on me instead of her....
I asked her to go to marriage counceling before she said she would but I am not ready for that yet nor do i have the money. I was told by someone here that is she says no to MC then its over but if she says yes there is a chance/hope. I think i will ask her again today and see if that has changed. any help out there?