Re: Wife spends the night at another man's house
Personally, I would not be happy if my boyfriend spent the night at another woman's house. On the other hand, she told you to come over, and you refused. What other options did she have? She told you she'd been drinking, and you didn't go over there? Yes, I suppose she could have called a cab, but then you could be complaining about the money spent on a cab and having to get up early to take her back over there.
That's my initial take on it. After some more thinking, in order to honestly answer your questions, I need to ask a couple of my own.
1. You say your wife's best friend "moved out" and this is the best friend's husband. You then mention the best friend having left the state. Are best friend and hubby still together and simply moving out of state, or are they separating? The reason I ask this is that this is your wife's best friend's husband. If they are still together, unless your wife is a really horrible person, I highly doubt she's going to jeopardize her friendship to sleep with her friend's husband. As a general rule, we women don't mess with our friend's men, or ex-men. Now, if the friend and her hubby are splitting up, I suppose it could be possible that your wife and her hubby are hooking up, but really...I doubt it.
2. Has your wife ever given you reason to not trust her? If she hasn't, then why are you so worried? I'll be honest, I've been cheated on by numerous ex-boyfriends and my ex-husband. So, it's really easy for me to take a missed phone call or a lack of contact for a day and turn it into my boyfriend is cheating on me, banging some waitress somewhere. But...he's NEVER done anything to make me think he would do that. He's NEVER cheated, NEVER lied, NEVER done anything that could even be remotely termed dishonest or vague. He's very honest, very straightforward. So, when those doubts begin to enter my head, I remind myself of all the "nevers" and force the doubts to go away, because I know they're unfounded. And unless your wife has given you reason to think she can't be trusted, I think that's what you need to do: remind yourself that she's never cheated, never lied, and so on. If you can't do that, then one of two things has happened: either she has done something to earn your distrust and you're pretending otherwise, or you have some serious issues of your own to work on.