Marriage vows vary greatly - don't assume
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Old 08-07-2010, 08:45 AM   #1 (permalink)
Join Date: Aug 2010
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Default Marriage vows vary greatly - don't assume

Numerous times in this forum posters have written words to the effect "that you married for better or for worse".

This is a very narrow view of marriage, based on a view found within the Catholic and undoubtedly other Christian ceremonies.

Wikipedia says on this page
Marriage vows - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
There is little leeway for a bride and groom to stamp their own mark on their Catholic wedding vows. Couples tying the knot in the Roman Catholic Church will essentially make the same pledge to one another.

The customary text in English is:
I, ____, take you, ____, to be my (husband/wife). I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.
I, ____, take you, ____, for my lawful (husband/wife), to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part.
Other religions and cultures do not use these vows, I can readily point to Hindu, Islam, & Judaism. Wikipedia shows that in the Peoples Republic of China these or similar vows aren't included.

When responding to questions on these boards please don't tell us that we've sworn these vows unless you know for sure.

Divorce has been a part of most cultures that existed before Saul aka Paul, Peter and others left Jerusalem.

Ideally we meet our spouse, our soul mate, fall in love, marry, and live happily ever after, growing closer year after year. The reality is that this is a wonderful hope, but not the reality in many marriages.

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Old 08-07-2010, 10:35 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Marriage vows vary greatly - don't assume

I think that when people bring that up in a post they are referring to the fact that nobody gets married to get divorced. Those may not be the words used in all worldwide marriage ceremonies, but the premise is the same. I doubt that the promise, vow, or whatever you want to call it has a clause that says, "stick around while times are good, but if it gets tough, feel free to take off."

The basic idea is that you are devoting some part of yourself to this person and you should honor that by putting forth your best efforts. Most on this forum are at least attempting to do that.
When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me".

Last edited by AmorousWarrior; 08-09-2010 at 10:44 AM. Reason: Spelling
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Old 08-09-2010, 09:10 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Marriage vows vary greatly - don't assume

I can't think of any vows that tell you "If you should ever be unhappy just go find someone who does make you happy, screw the one you are here with today" LMAO. I would def agree with AW.
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Old 08-09-2010, 10:42 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Marriage vows vary greatly - don't assume

Originally Posted by breeze View Post
I think it's all just about a promise made to the other person, and that's what most people respond to here, is the assumption that the promise meant something when you made it.
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