suzieq

I've been married 6 years, but have been with my husband for 17. We have two beautiful children and we've managed to stay together when our peers haven't. Today I'm feeling detached from this man more than ever. Why does my H say the most meanest words in his brain when we argue? Why is it so hard for him to admit when he's wrong, or take him days to apologize if he does at all? Is loving my H even enough anymore? I pray that his meanness will dissapear and he will communicate with me and maybe agree to disagree. I don't know if I'm in love with him or I just love him, because at this point, I'm confused about love. I don't know how he truly feels about me because it's like pulling teeth to get him to tell me, if he does or if i'm beautiful, he sure does know how to insult me, and discipline me in public, and in front of the kids. Please tell me is this love or resentment?

Susan2010

I don't understand the question, but why do you stay with a man who is mean to you and disciplines you in public? Why do you allow him to treat you this way?

You think possibly my questions are the reason?

Nekko

Probably resentment. But hey, if there's resentment that doesn't mean there's no love. Maybe you did something (lack of respect, not caring for his feelings) that lead him to this? Resentment is usually formed when the person has been hurt by some action of his spouse.

People who don't have any feelings usually don't bother to insult their spouses. They just don't care enough to do it and aren't very affected when their spouses hurt them. That's all i can come up with, maybe he's so stuck on imposing his point of view because he feels like he isn't being heard. Did he ever say 'you never listen to me' or something like that? Do you actually consider his arguments when you two dis-agree, or do you just stand by your own?

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lovinhim4ever

Have you told your hubby how he makes u feel wen he says those mean things? Sometimes wen my fiancé and I argue and things get to heated, we both go in separate rooms to cool off before talking things through. It's a good thing to do instead of saying things u both might regret later. Also, could u explain how he disciplines you?! Maybe you should try marriage counseling so u both can learn to communicate better. Hope this helps. Good luck!!!
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