Were I him I'd suggest you say "Yes dear" and give a kiss that knocks his socks off, better yet take his pants and socks off take his hand and lead him to your bedroom or the nearest soft chair. It would work for me.
His remarks clearly reflect his anger, I'm all too familiar with mine, I know it diminishes following passion for a day or so. "
As simple as it is- I love this advice.
You will need to step up the passon on your end and take the risk of being rejected by him.
I noticed you said ...." I hope that one day he will hug or kiss me and feel the reconnect that you do with your wife". You
will need to take the initiative and show him YOU still have the Passion. Whoever is feeling the Passion must openly express it deeply, daily. As you express and he "FEELS" this, hopefully he will begin to trust this, look forward to this. Rely on this new woman you have become, or the woman he once loved & cherish & wanted, felt that in the early days of your relationship - before work took priority.
I was Tooooo into my kids at one time, too focused on building our house/life, not paying enough attention to my husband, he was patient & loving through it all, it was never to the extremes expressed here. But I know he felt rejected sexually by me (more hurt in this area than any other). I didn't really know how deep until I started asking questions once my sex drive went up (a blessing), he never complained or anything, some men just hide what they feel.
Because I knew I caused this, I will say I went out of my way to revive our sex life. I became such a Passionate force, he was not sure what in the world to do with me. He was always receptive, and I do hope if you take this route, this risk of putting yourself out there sexually , intimately , seductively - he will respond. It will surely get his attention, maybe give him a double -take, but hey, that is a good thing.
If he makes a sarcastic remark, give him a flirting remark about what you want to do to him that night! He is trying to get a rise out of you, to hurt you for his hurt. Try not to take it too personal. Just focus on making up for those days, those lost years. All can be forgiven, if enough Love is showed and the willingness is there.
Have you done anything like THIS , surprised him with new lingerie, etc -You tell us. And if so, how did he respond ?
Another thing I highly recommend - to stir the Emotions of yesterday, the sweet memories, a little work invoved but so touching !! >>> If you have MOVIE MAKER on your computer,
scan your favorite Photos of you & him, choose the best from the begining of your relationship, photos of your wedding, till now, add your favorite love song to this, create this testatment to your love for him in Video form, and play this back to him. It may cause a flood of emotions in both of you -that will take you by surprise. I did this for a friend & her husband, it brought tears to his eyes. A very special thing to do for the one you love.
I made a few for me & my husband, I swear the night I did this was the beginning of my transformation to no longer take him for granted -ever again and to live for him & never put him 2nd.