lesherz42702

brieff history: my husband and i were highschool sweethearts... he joinged the military, we married young, things feel apart, he filed for a divorce... thi was when i was 18 i am now 22 we are still married not legally seperated but not together, have been with other people, but remained very close friends.... xmas we got alittle to close n i later found out i was pregnant the doctors said it could be his but it could be the guy i started dating right after him.... he knows this i have always been very honest with him.... we never stopped loving each other but circumstances have kept us apart..i have trust issues with him, he refused counseling, n well bein hes in the military its hard for us to fix things bein we are in different states.... well i stressed to him that the drs claimed thers like 5% chance the baby is his, and he is well aware that most likly she is biologically not his child... legally bein hes my husband she is his... he knows this, and is ok with this. well he asked me if id be willing to do counceling ... i told him yes... now for my question... is there any options for people who dont live near each other.. he will be in CA in oct. when he returns from iraq, and i will be in NJ living with his family ( very long story ). we both want this to work! we are both willing to try, but i am not willing to go to CA and move away from my fmaily n friends and support until we are able to be stable (not healthy for my child ). he is anting to be inthe delivery room when i give birth (providing hes home from iraq in time) , he has told me she is his regardless of true paternity, and he wants to be a father to her. the other guy well to keep this short its not safe for me to be near him i fear for my life....

draconis

I have never heard of a place that does it but what about video conforencing(sp)? Maybe you could get a councilor to do that so he can be there via the internet, or phone company.

draconis

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AZMOMOFTWO

I don't know what advice to offer but really wanted to wish you the best. I am sure there has been a lot of pressure on you both marrying so young and both of you fearing for his life in Iraq. These extenuating circumstances have put more strain on your marriage than most people face. The fact that he says he wants to be this child's father regardless if biologically he is, shows he does in fact love you. I would encourage you to communicate as much as possible, share with him the developments throughout your pregnancy, make him a part of it. I wish you both the best and a safe return for your husband.

trying2cope

I assume you have health care through the military?? I would suggest talking to your doctor and see if they could recommend someone. My guess is that due to the nature of military that this wouldn't be the first time that this has happened.